Question 1

How does God affirm me?

Accepted Answer

Genesis 1:27So God created human beings in his own image. In the image of God he created them; male and female he created them.God affirmed us when he created us like himself—in his own image.Romans 5:8God showed his great love for us by sending Christ to die for us while we were still sinners.1 Corinthians 15:3I passed on to you what was most important and what had also been passed on to me. Christ died for our sins, just as the Scriptures said.God values us so much that he was willing to send his Son to die for each of us so we could live forever with him, enjoying his love and care. He did this even while we were still stained with sin and had done nothing to deserve his forgiveness. God affirms our value, even if our lives are a mess.Psalm 139:13-18You made all the delicate, inner parts of my body and knit me together in my mother’s womb. Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex! Your workmanship is marvelous—how well I know it. You watched me as I was being formed in utter seclusion, as I was woven together in the dark of the womb. You saw me before I was born. Every day of my life was recorded in your book. Every moment was laid out before a single day had passed. How precious are your thoughts about me, O God. They cannot be numbered! I can’t even count them; they outnumber the grains of sand! And when I wake up, you are still with me!God affirms by declaring through David that he created us “wonderfully complex” and “marvelous,” knew us before we were born, and is constantly thinking of us.1 Samuel 16:7The Lord said to Samuel, “Don’t judge by his appearance or height, for I have rejected him. The Lord doesn’t see things the way you see them. People judge by outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.”Psalm 149:4The Lord delights in his people; he crowns the humble with victory.Matthew 6:3-4“When you give to someone in need, don’t let your left hand know what your right hand is doing. Give your gifts in private, and your Father, who sees everything, will reward you.”Galatians 1:10Obviously, I’m not trying to win the approval of people, but of God. If pleasing people were my goal, I would not be Christ’s servant.Philippians 1:6I am certain that God, who began the good work within you, will continue his work until it is finally finished on the day when Christ Jesus returns.1 Peter 2:5You are living stones that God is building into his spiritual temple. What’s more, you are his holy priests. Through the mediation of Jesus Christ, you offer spiritual sacrifices that please God.God affirms our efforts to follow him, even efforts that don’t earn affirmation from people around us or efforts that don’t seem to be making a difference. God delights in hearts that truly strive to follow him far more than he delights in the impressiveness of the results.1 Peter 2:9-10You are a chosen people. You are royal priests, a holy nation, God’s very own possession. As a result, you can show others the goodness of God, for he called you out of the darkness into his wonderful light. “Once you had no identity as a people; now you are God’s people. Once you received no mercy; now you have received God’s mercy.”God affirms us by reminding us who we are in Christ.Psalm 5:12You bless the godly, O Lord; you surround them with your shield of love.Psalm 67:1May God be merciful and bless us. May his face smile with favor on us.Isaiah 54:10For the mountains may move and the hills disappear, but even then my faithful love for you will remain.John 15:9I have loved you even as the Father has loved me. Remain in my love.1 Thessalonians 1:4We know, dear brothers and sisters, that God loves you and has chosen you to be his own people.1 Peter 5:10In his kindness God called you to share in his eternal glory by means of Christ Jesus. So after you have suffered a little while, he will restore, support, and strengthen you, and he will place you on a firm foundation.2 Peter 1:2May God give you more and more grace and peace as you grow in your knowledge of God and Jesus our Lord.God affirms us through his love, his blessings, his mercy, his forgiveness, and his gift of salvation. What greater affirmation can we receive than the affirmation of the Creator of the universe?Jeremiah 31:3Long ago the Lord said . . . “I have loved you, my people, with an everlasting love. With unfailing love I have drawn you to myself.”Life is the story of how God pursues us, rescues us from our sin, and restores us so that we can become the people we were created to be. When we read God’s words to us throughout the Bible, we should think about all he has done to show us how much we matter to him.

Question 2

How do I affirm God?

Accepted Answer

Deuteronomy 10:12-13“And now, Israel, what does the Lord your God require of you? He requires only that you fear the Lord your God, and live in a way that pleases him, and love him and serve him with all your heart and soul. And you must always obey the Lord’s commands and decrees that I am giving you today for your own good.”Psalm 72:18Praise the Lord God, the God of Israel, who alone does such wonderful things.Psalm 96:2Sing to the Lord; praise his name. Each day proclaim the good news that he saves.Psalm 100:4Enter his gates with thanksgiving; go into his courts with praise. Give thanks to him and praise his name.Psalm 134:2Lift your hands in holiness, and bless the Lord.Psalm 145:2I will praise you every day; yes, I will praise you forever.Psalm 150:6Let everything that breathes sing praises to the Lord! Praise the Lord!Romans 12:1And so, dear brothers and sisters, I plead with you to give your bodies to God because of all he has done for you. Let them be a living and holy sacrifice—the kind he will find acceptable. This is truly the way to worship him.To give or receive a blessing is a great affirmation. We affirm God through our praise, worship, and thanksgiving.

Question 3

How do we affirm one another? Why is it so important?

Accepted Answer

Romans 14:19So then, let us aim for harmony in the church and try to build each other up.1 Corinthians 14:26When you meet together, one will sing, another will teach, another will tell some special revelation God has given, one will speak in tongues, and another will interpret what is said. But everything that is done must strengthen all of you.1 Thessalonians 5:11, 13So encourage each other and build each other up, just as you are already doing . . . Show them great respect and wholehearted love because of their work. And live peacefully with each other.Hebrews 7:7Without question, the person who has the power to give a blessing is greater than the one who is blessed.We affirm one another through respect, encouragement, praise, and building each other up. This helps us and others feel loved and strengthens our sense of worth.Romans 1:11-12I long to visit you so I can bring you some spiritual gift that will help you grow strong in the Lord. When we get together, I want to encourage you in your faith, but I also want to be encouraged by yours.1 Corinthians 15:58So, my dear brothers and sisters, be strong and immovable. Always work enthusiastically for the Lord, for you know that nothing you do for the Lord is ever useless.Galatians 6:9So let’s not get tired of doing what is good. At just the right time we will reap a harvest of blessing if we don’t give up.2 Thessalonians 3:13Evil people and impostors will flourish. They will deceive others and will themselves be deceived.2 Timothy 1:5-7I remember your genuine faith, for you share the faith that first filled your grandmother Lois and your mother, Eunice. And I know that same faith continues strong in you. This is why I remind you to fan into flames the spiritual gift God gave you when I laid my hands on you. For God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love, and self-discipline.When we are afraid, discouraged, or weary, godly affirmation can encourage us to persevere.

Question 4

When might our desire for affirmation be unhealthy?

Accepted Answer

Matthew 25:23“The master said, ‘Well done, my good and faithful servant. You have been faithful in handling this small amount, so now I will give you many more responsibilities. Let’s celebrate together!’”Romans 5:8God showed his great love for us by sending Christ to die for us while we were still sinners.Colossians 3:23-24Work willingly at whatever you do, as though you were working for the Lord rather than for people. Remember that the Lord will give you an inheritance as your reward, and that the Master you are serving is Christ.1 Thessalonians 4:1Finally, dear brothers and sisters, we urge you in the name of the Lord Jesus to live in a way that pleases God, as we have taught you. You live this way already, and we encourage you to do so even more.1 John 3:1See how very much our Father loves us, for he calls us his children, and that is what we are! But the people who belong to this world don’t recognize that we are God’s children because they don’t know him.1 John 4:18Such love has no fear, because perfect love expels all fear. If we are afraid, it is for fear of punishment, and this shows that we have not fully experienced his perfect love.A desire to honor and please God is good. Our greatest goal should be to stand before him some day and hear, “Well done, my good and faithful servant” (Matthew 5:21). However, we should not confuse love and affirmation. Even while we were sinners and enslaved to evil desires (which God does not affirm), God loved us and sent his Son to die for us. We don’t need to live in fear that we are not good enough for God—he has chosen us, he loves us, and he refuses to give up on us. He doesn’t love us because of what we have accomplished. He loves us because we are his precious children.Matthew 5:16“Let your good deeds shine out for all to see, so that everyone will praise your heavenly Father.”Luke 2:52Jesus grew in wisdom and in stature and in favor with God and all the people.Galatians 1:10Obviously, I’m not trying to win the approval of people, but of God. If pleasing people were my goal, I would not be Christ’s servant.1 Thessalonians 2:4We speak as messengers approved by God to be entrusted with the Good News. Our purpose is to please God, not people. He alone examines the motives of our hearts.1 Thessalonians 5:11So encourage each other and build each other up, just as you are already doing.1 Timothy 6:5These people always cause trouble. Their minds are corrupt, and they have turned their backs on the truth. To them, a show of godliness is just a way to become wealthy.Titus 2:6-8In the same way, encourage the young men to live wisely. And you yourself must be an example to them by doing good works of every kind. Let everything you do reflect the integrity and seriousness of your teaching. Teach the truth so that your teaching can’t be criticized. Then those who oppose us will be ashamed and have nothing bad to say about us.Winning human approval is not in itself bad, and in many cases, it can be good. Living a good, honorable life is an important part of our Christian witness. If, however, we care more about success and human affirmation than faithfulness to God and his gospel, we are making a grave mistake. Sometimes, godliness leads to human affirmation, but sometimes, it doesn’t. That’s why we need to cultivate a longing for God’s affirmation above anyone else’s.Psalm 12:3May the Lord cut off their flattering lips and silence their boastful tongues.Proverbs 27:6Wounds from a sincere friend are better than many kisses from an enemy.Proverbs 28:23In the end, people appreciate honest criticism far more than flattery.Proverbs 29:5To flatter friends is to lay a trap for their feet.2 Timothy 4:3-4A time is coming when people will no longer listen to sound and wholesome teaching. They will follow their own desires and will look for teachers who will tell them whatever their itching ears want to hear. They will reject the truth and chase after myths.Flattery is false affirmation. Our hunger for affirmation may lead to people telling us what we want to hear—and manipulating us through that. A friend who speaks the truth, even when it is difficult, should be greatly treasured.Proverbs 13:20Walk with the wise and become wise; associate with fools and get in trouble.Proverbs 22:24-25Don’t befriend angry people or associate with hot-tempered people, or you will learn to be like them and endanger your soul.1 Corinthians 15:33Don’t be fooled by those who say such things, for “bad company corrupts good character.”One subtle way we seek affirmation from others is by imitating them. If we surround ourselves with ungodly friends, our desire for human affirmation will erode our desire to honor God.Matthew 6:1“Watch out! Don’t do your good deeds publicly, to be admired by others, for you will lose the reward from your Father in heaven.”Even if we seek affirmation from the right kind of people, Satan can twist our desire for affirmation to distract us from what matters most. If we care more about winning others’ affirmation than we care about blessing others with our time, resources, and talents, then we will fall short of truly living out God’s love.

Question 5

What should I do when I don’t feel affirmed, and I feel rejected?

Accepted Answer

Psalm 27:10Even if my father and mother abandon me, the Lord will hold me close.Isaiah 49:15“Never! Can a mother forget her nursing child? Can she feel no love for the child she has borne? But even if that were possible, I would not forget you!”When we feel unaffirmed or rejected, we should remember that God loves us more than any human ever could. Even when our closest relationships disappoint us, God remains faithful.Isaiah 53:3He was despised and rejected—a man of sorrows, acquainted with deepest grief. We turned our backs on him and looked the other way. He was despised, and we did not care.John 1:10-11He came into the very world he created, but the world didn’t recognize him. He came to his own people, and even they rejected him.Hebrews 4:15This High Priest of ours understands our weaknesses, for he faced all of the same testings we do, yet he did not sin.1 Peter 2:4You are coming to Christ, who is the living cornerstone of God’s temple. He was rejected by people, but he was chosen by God for great honor.Jesus knows how being rejected feels. He was even rejected by his family who thought he was crazy (Mark 3:21) and his closest followers who betrayed and denied him and by those who mocked and tortured him in his final hours, people he had come to save. When we feel unaffirmed and rejected, we can find comfort in our Lord who understands our pain.Ephesians 4:16He makes the whole body fit together perfectly. As each part does its own special work, it helps the other parts grow, so that the whole body is healthy and growing and full of love.1 Thessalonians 5:11So encourage each other and build each other up, just as you are already doing.Hebrews 10:25Let us not neglect our meeting together, as some people do, but encourage one another, especially now that the day of his return is drawing near.Sometimes, when we feel unaffirmed and rejected, we withdraw from others even further. This isolates us from other Christians who could encourage and support us. Every believer is a part of the body of Christ, and when a part is separated from the rest of the body, it doesn’t last long. We should not allow fear or discouragement to hold us back from seeking the Christian fellowship we need.Matthew 5:44“But I say, love your enemies! Pray for those who persecute you!”Luke 6:22“What blessings await you when people hate you and exclude you and mock you and curse you as evil because you follow the Son of Man.”John 5:19So Jesus explained, “I tell you the truth, the Son can do nothing by himself. He does only what he sees the Father doing. Whatever the Father does, the Son also does.”Romans 12:17Never pay back evil with more evil. Do things in such a way that everyone can see you are honorable.1 Peter 3:17Remember, it is better to suffer for doing good, if that is what God wants, than to suffer for doing wrong!1 Peter 4:15-16If you suffer, however, it must not be for murder, stealing, making trouble, or prying into other people’s affairs. But it is no shame to suffer for being a Christian. Praise God for the privilege of being called by his name!Sometimes, the world rejects us because we are honoring God. Jesus warns us that we will be persecuted, and we are promised honor and reward in the face of persecution. But we should also be humble enough to consider the possible reasons for others rejecting us. Sometimes anger, self-righteousness, bitterness, and pride inspire us to return evil for evil. If we are suffering because of our own un-Christlike behavior, we should pray for God to help us love and forgive our enemies. Only then can we be a pure witness for Christ.

Affirmation