Principle 6: Communicate Well And Often.

UNCOMMON WISDOM

Walk with the wise and become wise; associate with fools and get in trouble.

—Proverbs 13:20

UNCOMMON PRACTICE

Take a few moments to select one of this week’s practices to explore further. The related Adventure Application appears just below each practice. If you’d prefer to come up with a different way of living out that practice this week, feel free to discuss what that might look like.

Pay attention to and use your spouse’s preferred form of communication.

If you and your spouse have identified your love language, talk for a few minutes about how it affects the way you like to communicate with others. If you’ve never given your love languages much thought, you might visit http://www.5lovelanguages.com/, which provides much more information.

Ask whether you both have peace and are on the same page before committing to a major decision.

How satisfied are you with your process for making major decisions? Do you both feel valued and included? Are there any decisions that you should discuss even now?

Remember that, with your words, you are teaching your kids how to speak to others.

Do either you or your spouse use any “catchphrases” that you’ve noticed your children picking up on? If so, and if that’s a pattern you don’t want to encourage, how you can help each other replace those words with more positive expressions?

Use technology to keep you connected; don’t allow it to pull you apart.

Whenever the latest and greatest device, program, or app comes along, take the time to decide if its influence on your family will be positive or negative. When it comes to technology, is there anything you should revisit? Phones during meals? Certain time constraints for video games or movies? Limits on the Internet?

Seek to honor your spouse and children by the way you speak about them to others.

Do you build up your spouse and children when you discuss them with others? Would you be comfortable if they heard what you were saying? What about when you speak to them? Are you giving them your blessing? If not, think about your words and how you might use them as a tool for good.

Remember that the way you are relating to each other is creating a blueprint for your kids.

What “blueprint,” or plan, do you have for speaking the best of each other for the sake of your kids and others who are watching you? If you’ve never thought about this before, you might spend a few minutes brainstorming the qualities you’d like others to see as they watch you interact. What is one change you can make this week to provide a better model of positive communication?

UNCOMMON PRAYER

Take a few minutes to discuss any praises and needs you’d like to bring to God as a couple. Then, in addition to praying about those things, use one or more of the following prayer prompts to ask the Lord to help you communicate with each other more regularly, lovingly, and clearly.

Praise God for communicating His love and acceptance of you so clearly through Scripture, Jesus’ death and resurrection, and the Holy Spirit’s work in your lives.

Confess any instances this week when your communication—whether through words, body language, or even silence—made another person feel rejected, condemned, or discouraged.

Ask the Holy Spirit to give you wisdom as you discuss limits to place on the use of technology—particularly by your children.

Lift up each member of your household by name, thanking God for his or her presence in your lives and asking Him to help you encourage and challenge that person to become a man or woman after God’s own heart.