Prayer Of An Imperfect Mother

Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything.

Philippians 4:6

I recently discovered this lone entry I wrote in a forgotten journal when our daughter was almost six and heading to dance class. (She is now twenty-one!) The crazy thing is that the day I discovered it, I was feeling the same “letting go” pains as I did when she drove away in her first car!

Oh, Lord, today I wanted to go home after dropping Special K off for dance and put my thoughts on paper. How good You are to remind me of Yourself in the everyday of life.

The strangest sensation came over me as I watched Special K (turning six in two days) skip up the ramp by herself and look back with a wave to let me know she had arrived safely at the door. My baby didn’t need me to walk her to the door anymore.

I prayed, “Hold Special K tightly, Lord.”

That has been the prayer of my heart for her to this day, and God has faithfully answered it over and over again.

We all have many “letting go” aches in our lives. Thankfully, God never lets go of us. I need that assurance often, especially when I am struggling to do what He wants. “Thank You, God, for loving me much more than I deserve. Father, I have so many weaknesses. I am easily angered, I get hyper about being late, and I keep things inside. And when my faults surface, I don’t like them. I am recommitting myself to be Your woman, a God’s girl in every way.”

And by the way, here was the PS in my journal all those years ago that has turned into an SP (Sweet Pea).

PS: Before I forget, thank You for using Special K to make me laugh today when she sang, “Hark! the herald angels sing, ‘Glory to the newborn King; peace on earth, and mercy mild, God and sinners Frankenstein!’”

Fearful of “letting go”? God will fill the hole in our hearts with His presence through any letting-go pains.