The Freedom Of Owning Our Mistakes

The Freedom of Owning Our Mistakes

It is by believing in your heart that you are made right with God, and it is by confessing with your mouth that you are saved.

Romans 10:10

Not far from our home in Seattle is the corporate headquarters of Starbucks, and when Howard Schultz resigned from his position as the CEO of Starbucks in 2000, it was big news. The giant coffee chain was experiencing steady growth. But eight years later, when Starbucks was reeling from a bad economy and stiff competition, Schultz resumed his role as Starbucks’s chief executive and faced a challenging mission: to lead a turnaround. In an interview with the Harvard Business Review about his return, Schultz commented that before they could move forward, they had to deal with the past by honestly admitting their mistakes.

When I returned in January 2008, things were actually worse than I’d thought. The decisions we made were very difficult, but first there had to be a time when we stood up in front of the entire company as leaders and made almost a confession—that the leadership had failed the 180,000 Starbucks people and their families. . . . We had to admit to ourselves and to the people of this company that we owned the mistakes that were made. Once we did, it was a powerful turning point. It’s like when you have a secret and get it out: The burden is off your shoulders.^a

You know the feeling, don’t you? To be released from the burden of trying to skirt responsibility is freeing.

Maybe you’ve seen the bumper sticker: “The man who can smile when things are going badly has just thought of someone to blame it on.” Sadly, this is sometimes not too far from the truth. We tend to abhor vulnerability, and nothing makes us feel more vulnerable than admitting imperfection and confessing true need. We’d much rather find someone or something to blame.

Better yet, we’d like to guard against vulnerability in the first place by being blameless. If we could only manage to be perfect, we’d be blameless. So admitting any weakness or mistake, we think, makes us vulnerable to rejection.

And of course it does. When we take off our protective armor in the name of honest self-disclosure, someone may take advantage of us—even our spouses. But with God there is a twist, and it always works in our favor. Our vulnerability draws God to us. Our helplessness reveals his presence. Our weakness makes known his strength. And our confessions prompt his grace.

With God’s help we can do the same thing for one another. We can make our relationship a safe place to become vulnerable and to own our mistakes. What is one practical way that each of you can offer the other person grace this very day?

Mistakes are always forgivable, if one has the courage to admit them.

—Bruce Lee

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