Our Secret Sauce, My Recipe - Don’t Say Everything You’re Thinking

Our Secret Sauce, My Recipe - Don’t Say Everything You’re Thinking

OH, THIS IS SUCH a tough one for a lot of us—especially with our mates. And I’ll be honest with you, this is not one I come by naturally. I tend to say what I’m thinking, and when I’m not thinking something pleasant—well, you know—it’s not good.

So I learned this secret sauce ingredient from Steve. His diplomacy and timing have taught me that I don’t have to share every stinkin’ thing I’m thinking. As an example, I got real worked up one day over an injustice dealt us in a real estate transaction. My list of grievances went from here to yonder as I practiced the oral summation I would present to the development executives, aka scoundrels, on Steve. He smiled, sat quietly for a moment, and then said, “Why don’t you just politely tell them that you’re pulling your offer? They know the mistakes they’ve made. You don’t have to tell them again.” With Steve’s assistance and a bit more maturity, I’ve learned that there are some things that fly into my head that are merely a reaction to the moment, the challenge, or a hormone surge. I’ve learned that by practicing say what you mean and mean what you say, I must stop and actually think about my position rather than just react emotionally.

When you take the time to really think about your position, the heat of the moment dissipates, allowing you to get a new perspective on your thoughts, maybe hours or even days later. Once the adrenaline drops or your hormone levels return to something close to normal, you most likely will decide that the topic is not worth the emotional exercise.

I have never regretted holding my tongue, but I sure have deep remorse for things I’ve said that I wish I could take back.

Kind words are like honey—sweet to the soul and healthy for the body. (Proverbs 16:24)

Girlfriends, to really have a great secret sauce, you must choose to let some things go. In the grand scheme of your life together, some things really don’t matter and should be left unsaid. Don’t use all your words today; try to save some for tomorrow.