One Breath Away from Burnout - An Exhausted Heart (Part Deux)

One Breath Away from Burnout - An Exhausted Heart (Part Deux)

WOMEN COME by this kite-flying thing pretty naturally. Many of us like to hold on to the kite strings of our relationships. We really like the feeling of control this gives us. Crazy as it sounds, I think it all starts while we’re still in pigtails.

Men, throughout their formidable years as little boys, set up battlefields and rescue scenarios, strategizing how to best control situations. They look to be the protectors; they feel their role is to provide answers and solutions. Little girls, however, become the control mavens we are through our fastidious placement of a perfectly formed family in the perfectly decorated rooms of our perfectly proportioned dollhouse. We are in control of this family! Good grief—no wonder we’re twisted.

I was in my office working when Scott called and said he had something to tell me. After he admitted he had been deceptive with me and had relapsed, I hung up the phone. My heart was so exhausted, I couldn’t even hold my head up. As I put my head on my desk, I let go of my kite.

I was so disappointed and disillusioned that I didn’t talk with Scott for three weeks. Finally, I called him and invited him to lunch. Over a plate of chicken fried steak (how can kids eat like this?), he told me about his recent success in getting back on his plan. I told him how proud I was of him.

Wanting Scott to understand that our relationship would be different from then on, I shared with him that I had let go of our kite of relationship. I explained that I couldn’t hold on anymore. That I loved him but he’d have to sail on his own now.

His reply? “Mom, I’m proud of you!” You see, Scott was also exhausted—he was worn out from me tugging on his string.

So the LORD must wait for you to come to him so he can show you his love and compassion. For the LORD is a faithful God. Blessed are those who wait for his help. (Isaiah 30:18)

Are you holding on too tight to your kite of relationship? It might be time to let it go.