We Are Too Busy For Friends

“‘Martha, Martha,’ the Lord answered, ‘you are worried and upset about many things, but few things are needed—or indeed only one. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her.’” (Luke 10:41-42, NIV)

“If I speak in the tongues of men or of angels, but do not have love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing. If I give all I possess to the poor and give over my body to hardship that I may boast, but do not have love, I gain nothing.” (1 Corinthians 13:1-3, NIV)

A Millennial’s hurdle to friendships is being “busy.” Our culture is obsessed with productivity—measuring our worth by how much we can accomplish in the shortest amount of time possible. Have you seen your Instagram feed lately? Planners, goals, cute phrases about “getting stuff done.”

Busyness is a lie to limit us from time-consuming friendships. We don’t think we have time to make new friends. We don’t have that extra ten minutes to call someone back. And certainly, we don’t have time to serve a friend in need. We’ve got things to do, errands to run, lists to cross off.

Our time is not only dictated by our hobbies but by positive things, too.

Most busy lifestyles are created from a combination of good endeavors: providing for our families, pursuing a God-given dream, or ministering to God’s people. However, when we put all these things together, can we accomplish any of them very well?

We know that when Jesus came to visit his dear friends, Mary and Martha, Martha was caught up in “girlboss” mode. She’s getting stuff done, she is being the Pinterest hostess by cleaning things up and making things look the best for their guest (Luke 10:38-42). Yet Jesus is less concerned about the state of the home and more concerned about the state of the heart. He tells Martha to put away the worry and choose to be still before him.

Are our busy efforts worth it if we don’t root them in love and allow them to take more time than we can allot in our planner? (see 1 Corinthians 13)

Choosing to sit before the Lord is an act of discipline that helps us choose to sit with our friends. Even if it takes up our time and we didn’t get the laundry done like we planned. We will have chosen what is better—rooted faiths and rooted friendships—and the enemy cannot take that away from us.

Prayer:

Lord, help me to choose time with you and time with others. I know slowing down can bring so much life to my friendships and I want to be someone who can be present with others. Help me discern my calendar and find where I can clear my schedule to be present with friends. Amen.