Question 1

How should I deal with loss in my life?

Accepted Answer

Matthew 14:12-13Later, John’s disciples came for his body and buried it. Then they went and told Jesus what had happened. As soon as Jesus heard the news, he left in a boat to a remote area to be alone.John 11:35Then Jesus wept.We should never deny our loss. Even if we know we will see someone again someday, separation is painful. The tears of Jesus at Lazarus’s death forever validate our tears of grief.Genesis 50:1-13Joseph threw himself on his father and wept over him and kissed him. . . . And the Egyptians mourned his death for seventy days. When the period of mourning was over, Joseph approached Pharaoh’s advisers and said, “Please do me this favor and speak to Pharaoh on my behalf. Tell him that my father made me swear an oath. He said to me, ‘Listen, I am about to die. Take my body back to the land of Canaan, and bury me in the tomb I prepared for myself.’ . . . . When they arrived at the threshing floor of Atad, near the Jordan River, they held a very great and solemn memorial service, with a seven-day period of mourning for Joseph’s father. . . . So Jacob’s sons did as he had commanded them. They carried his body to the land of Canaan and buried him in the cave in the field of Machpelah, near Mamre.Grief is a process that should not be denied or hurried. The rituals of wakes, visitations, funerals, and memorial services all help us move through stages of grief. If a loss does not involve death (such as a friend moving away, a damaged relationship, or the loss of a good job) we still need to allow ourselves to grieve in order to bring healing to our hurt souls.2 Samuel 11:1-3In the spring of the year, when kings normally go out to war, David sent Joab and the Israelite army to fight the Ammonites. . . . However, David stayed behind in Jerusalem. Late one afternoon, after his midday rest, David got out of bed and was walking on the roof of the palace. As he looked out over the city, he noticed a woman of unusual beauty taking a bath. He sent someone to find out who she was.For reasons not known, King David gave up the active leadership of his troops. The loss may have created a vacuum in his life that he sought to fill with an immoral relationship with Bathsheba. As we grieve our losses, we must be careful not to “medicate” our pain in ways that will only create more pain.Job 1:20-22Job stood up and tore his robe in grief. . . . He said, “I came naked from my mother’s womb, and I will be naked when I leave. The Lord gave me what I had, and the Lord has taken it away. Praise the name of the Lord!” In all of this, Job did not sin by blaming God.Ecclesiastes 3:1, 4For everything there is a season, a time for every activity under heaven. . . . A time to cry and a time to laugh. A time to grieve and a time to dance.Losses always bring pain. Recognizing and expressing that pain is not wrong or sinful but, rather, a healthy human response that expresses how God created us.Romans 12:15Be happy with those who are happy, and weep with those who weep.2 Corinthians 1:4He [God] comforts us in all our troubles so that we can comfort others. When they are troubled, we will be able to give them the same comfort God has given us.Mourning is a deeply personal experience. Some withdraw from others during their times of mourning. While withdrawal may be needed to leave time for healing, we should never isolate ourselves from others’ love and support. Friends who mourn with us—especially those who have experienced a similar loss—are a great blessing to those who mourn.Lamentations 3:18-25I cry out, “My splendor is gone! Everything I had hoped for from the Lord is lost!” The thought of my suffering and homelessness is bitter beyond words. I will never forget this awful time, as I grieve over my loss. Yet I still dare to hope when I remember this: The faithful love of the Lord never ends! His mercies never cease. Great is his faithfulness; his mercies begin afresh each morning. I say to myself, “The Lord is my inheritance; therefore, I will hope in him!” The Lord is good to those who depend on him, to those who search for him.1 Thessalonians 4:13-14, 18We want you to know what will happen to the believers who have died so you will not grieve like people who have no hope. For since we believe that Jesus died and was raised to life again, we also believe that when Jesus returns, God will bring back with him the believers who have died. . . . So encourage each other with these words.Those who know God grieve with the assurance of his love and have hope in his promises. Those who don’t know God grieve alone and without hope.John 16:20-22“I tell you the truth, you will weep and mourn over what is going to happen to me, but the world will rejoice. You will grieve, but your grief will suddenly turn to wonderful joy. It will be like a woman suffering the pains of labor. When her child is born, her anguish gives way to joy because she has brought a new baby into the world. So you have sorrow now, but I will see you again; then you will rejoice, and no one can rob you of that joy.”Hebrews 10:34You suffered along with those who were thrown into jail, and when all you owned was taken from you, you accepted it with joy. You knew there were better things waiting for you that will last forever.We should allow ourselves to grieve, but at some point grieving needs to end. By serving God and others with all the energy and enthusiasm we can muster, we will begin to find healing. As Christians, we have the comfort of knowing that one day we will be with God in heaven where all grief will be gone forever.

Question 2

I feel like I have lost everything. Where can I turn?

Accepted Answer

Psalm 31:9–10Have mercy on me, Lord, for I am in distress. Tears blur my eyes. My body and soul are withering away. I am dying from grief; my years are shortened by sadness.Psalm 34:18The Lord is close to the brokenhearted; he rescues those whose spirits are crushed.Psalm 56:8You keep track of all my sorrows. You have collected all my tears in your bottle. You have recorded each one in your book.We must turn to God in times of loss, for he is an endless source of hope and comfort.Psalm 119:28I weep with sorrow; encourage me by your word.We must turn to God’s word, a powerful and profound source of comfort and encouragement.2 Corinthians 1:4He [God] comforts us in all our troubles so that we can comfort others. When they are troubled, we will be able to give them the same comfort God has given us.We must turn to other believers who have experienced similar losses. Godly people who have suffered terrible loss often have great compassion, wisdom, comfort, and encouragement to share with those who are grieving.Psalm 23:4Even when I walk through the darkest valley, I will not be afraid, for you are close beside me. Your rod and your staff protect and comfort me.We must turn to the Lord any difficult circumstance, especially in the darkness of grief. He is our source of comfort and protection.Isaiah 53:3-7He [the Messiah] was despised and rejected—a man of sorrows, acquainted with deepest grief. We turned our backs on him and looked the other way. He was despised, and we did not care. Yet it was our weaknesses he carried; it was our sorrows that weighed him down. And we thought his troubles were a punishment from God, a punishment for his own sins! But he was pierced for our rebellion, crushed for our sins. He was beaten so we could be whole. He was whipped so we could be healed. All of us, like sheep, have strayed away. We have left God’s paths to follow our own. Yet the Lord laid on him the sins of us all. He was oppressed and treated harshly, yet he never said a word. He was led like a lamb to the slaughter. And as a sheep is silent before the shearers, he did not open his mouth.Hebrews 4:15This High Priest of ours understands our weaknesses, for he faced all of the same testings we do, yet he did not sin.We must remember that God demonstrated his love for us by experiencing all the griefs and sorrows that we could ever experience. He knows. He feels. He understands.

Question 3

How can God help me survive life’s losses?

Accepted Answer

Psalm 10:17Lord, you know the hopes of the helpless. Surely you will hear their cries and comfort them.Psalm 30:11-12You have turned my mourning into joyful dancing. You have taken away my clothes of mourning and clothed me with joy, that I might sing praises to you and not be silent. O Lord my God, I will give you thanks forever!Psalm 102:17He [the Lord] will listen to the prayers of the destitute. He will not reject their pleas.Psalm 147:3He [the Lord] heals the brokenhearted and bandages their wounds.Lamentations 3:32Though he [the Lord] brings grief, he also shows compassion because of the greatness of his unfailing love.Matthew 5:4“God blesses those who mourn, for they will be comforted.”2 Corinthians 1:3All praise to God, the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ. God is our merciful Father and the source of all comfort.In times of loss, God fills us with his blessings: comfort, love, and mercy. In time, this will lead us to thanksgiving, joy, and songs of praise. When we cry out to God for help, he will hold us close.

Question 4

What losses are for my good?

Accepted Answer

Philippians 3:4-11I [the apostle Paul] could have confidence in my own effort if anyone could. Indeed, if others have reason for confidence in their own efforts, I have even more! . . . I once thought these things were valuable, but now I consider them worthless because of what Christ has done. Yes, everything else is worthless when compared with the infinite value of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord.1 Peter 5:6-7So humble yourselves under the mighty power of God, and at the right time he will lift you up in honor. Give all your worries and cares to God, for he cares about you.To know the power of Christ in our lives, we must be willing to lose all our self-importance and pride, humbling ourselves under “the mighty power of God.”Colossians 3:5-9So put to death the sinful, earthly things lurking within you. Have nothing to do with sexual immorality, impurity, lust, and evil desires. Don’t be greedy, for a greedy person is an idolater, worshiping the things of this world. Because of these sins, the anger of God is coming. You used to do these things when your life was still part of this world. But now is the time to get rid of anger, rage, malicious behavior, slander, and dirty language. Don’t lie to each other, for you have stripped off your old sinful nature and all its wicked deeds.When we give our hearts and lives to Christ, we must treat our old lifestyles as if they are dead and gone!Proverbs 22:24-25Don’t befriend angry people or associate with hot-tempered people, or you will learn to be like them and endanger your soul.1 Corinthians 15:33[Some say] “Let’s feast and drink, for tomorrow we die!” Don’t be fooled by those who say such things, for “bad company corrupts good character.”Galatians 1:10I’m not trying to win the approval of people, but of God. If pleasing people were my goal, I would not be Christ’s servant.Ephesians 5:3-7Let there be no sexual immorality, impurity, or greed among you. Such sins have no place among God’s people. Obscene stories, foolish talk, and coarse jokes—these are not for you. Instead, let there be thankfulness to God. You can be sure that no immoral, impure, or greedy person will inherit the Kingdom of Christ and of God. For a greedy person is an idolater, worshiping the things of this world. Don’t be fooled by those who try to excuse these sins, for the anger of God will fall on all who disobey him. Don’t participate in the things these people do.Unhealthy relationships and people-pleasing can tempt us to leave God’s path. We must be willing to lose relationships that turn us away from God.Hosea 2:9-14“But now I will take back the ripened grain and new wine I generously provided each harvest season. I will take away the wool and linen clothing I gave her to cover her nakedness. . . . But then I will win her back once again. I will lead her into the desert and speak tenderly to her there.”Matthew 6:19-21“Don’t store up treasures here on earth, where moths eat them and rust destroys them, and where thieves break in and steal. Store your treasures in heaven, where moths and rust cannot destroy, and thieves do not break in and steal. Wherever your treasure is, there the desires of your heart will also be.”Luke 18:22-25When Jesus heard his answer, he said, “There is still one thing you haven’t done. Sell all your possessions and give the money to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven. Then come, follow me.” But when the man heard this he became sad, for he was very rich. When Jesus saw this, he said, “How hard it is for the rich to enter the Kingdom of God! In fact, it is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for a rich person to enter the Kingdom of God!”Sometimes God takes away things in our lives that have taken his place in our hearts. These losses help us realign our priorities with God’s and remind us that our greatest gain is the eternal inheritance he has promised us.

Question 5

What would be the most tragic loss?

Accepted Answer

Mark 8:36“What do you benefit if you gain the whole world but lose your own soul?”We can gain riches, wealth, and status but still suffer the tragic and eternal loss of our souls. Other losses mean nothing in comparison with losing our soul.Matthew 5:13-16“You are the salt of the earth. But what good is salt if it has lost its flavor? Can you make it salty again? It will be thrown out and trampled underfoot as worthless. You are the light of the world—like a city on a hilltop that cannot be hidden. No one lights a lamp and then puts it under a basket. Instead, a lamp is placed on a stand, where it gives light to everyone in the house. In the same way, let your good deeds shine out for all to see, so that everyone will praise your heavenly Father.”As followers of Christ, if we allow the distinctive joy and purity of our lives to be lost to temptation and sin, the Kingdom of God suffers great loss.

Question 6

What can I never lose?

Accepted Answer

Matthew 28:20“Teach these new disciples to obey all the commands I have given you. And be sure of this: I am with you always, even to the end of the age.”Romans 8:35, 38-39Can anything ever separate us from Christ’s love? Does it mean he no longer loves us if we have trouble or calamity, or are persecuted, or hungry, or destitute, or in danger, or threatened with death? . . . And I am convinced that nothing can ever separate us from God’s love. Neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither our fears for today nor our worries about tomorrow—not even the powers of hell can separate us from God’s love. No power in the sky above or in the earth below—indeed, nothing in all creation will ever be able to separate us from the love of God that is revealed in Christ Jesus our Lord.When we trust in the Lord, we will never lose his love, his presence, and his promise of salvation. These three greatest gifts can see us through life’s difficulties and give us hope.1 Peter 1:3-4All praise to God, the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ. It is by his great mercy that we have been born again, because God raised Jesus Christ from the dead. Now we live with great expectation, and we have a priceless inheritance—an inheritance that is kept in heaven for you, pure and undefiled, beyond the reach of change and decay.We can never lose our heavenly inheritance.Matthew 6:20“Store your treasures in heaven, where moths and rust cannot destroy, and thieves do not break in and steal.”1 Corinthians 3:13-14On the judgment day, fire will reveal what kind of work each builder has done. The fire will show if a person’s work has any value. If the work survives, that builder will receive a reward.What we do in this life can have a lasting impact on eternity. Faithful service, sharing God’s word, and caring for people in need will lead to rewards that can never be lost.