Question 1

What causes hostility?

Accepted Answer

Galatians 5:19-20When you follow the desires of your sinful nature, the results are very clear: sexual immorality, impurity, lustful pleasures, idolatry, sorcery, hostility, quarreling, jealousy, outbursts of anger, selfish ambition, dissension, division,Sin creates hostility between us and others.Romans 8:5-8Those who are dominated by the sinful nature think about sinful things, but those who are controlled by the Holy Spirit think about things that please the Spirit. So letting your sinful nature control your mind leads to death. But letting the Spirit control your mind leads to life and peace. For the sinful nature is always hostile to God. It never did obey God’s laws, and it never will. That’s why those who are still under the control of their sinful nature can never please God.Sin creates hostility between people and God.Genesis 4:5-8He [the Lord] did not accept Cain and his gift. This made Cain very angry, and he looked dejected. “Why are you so angry?” the Lord asked Cain. “Why do you look so dejected? You will be accepted if you do what is right. But if you refuse to do what is right, then watch out! Sin is crouching at the door, eager to control you. But you must subdue it and be its master.” One day Cain suggested to his brother, “Let’s go out into the fields.” And while they were in the field, Cain attacked his brother, Abel, and killed him.Genesis 27:41From that time on, Esau hated Jacob because their father had given Jacob the blessing. And Esau began to scheme: “I will soon be mourning my father’s death. Then I will kill my brother, Jacob.”Genesis 37:4His brothers hated Joseph because their father loved him more than the rest of them. They couldn’t say a kind word to him.Genesis 49:6-7“May I never join in their meetings; may I never be a party to their plans. For in their anger they murdered men, and they crippled oxen just for sport. A curse on their anger, for it is fierce; a curse on their wrath, for it is cruel. I will scatter them among the descendants of Jacob; I will disperse them throughout Israel.”Judges 18:25The men of Dan said, “Watch what you say! There are some short-tempered men around here who might get angry and kill you and your family.”Proverbs 27:4Anger is cruel, and wrath is like a flood, but jealousy is even more dangerous.Proverbs 29:22An angry person starts fights; a hot-tempered person commits all kinds of sin.Acts 17:5-7Some of the Jews were jealous, so they gathered some troublemakers from the marketplace to form a mob and start a riot. They attacked the home of Jason, searching for Paul and Silas so they could drag them out to the crowd. Not finding them there, they dragged out Jason and some of the other believers instead and took them before the city council. “Paul and Silas have caused trouble all over the world,” they shouted, “and now they are here disturbing our city, too. And Jason has welcomed them into his home. They are all guilty of treason against Caesar, for they profess allegiance to another king, named Jesus.”The root source of hostility is sin, which can come in the forms of anger, jealousy, and hatred. These fuels feed the fire of hostility. To prevent hostility, we should work to control and defuse our anger, release our jealousy, and pursue forgiveness. On our own, it may not be within our power to end the hostility in a relationship, but we can certainly do our part to make it possible. In time, that may inspire others to come along and do the same.Matthew 24:9“Then you will be arrested, persecuted, and killed. You will be hated all over the world because you are my followers.”Mark 13:13“And everyone will hate you because you are my followers. But the one who endures to the end will be saved.”Luke 12:51-53“Do you think I have come to bring peace to the earth? No, I have come to divide people against each other! From now on families will be split apart, three in favor of me, and two against—or two in favor and three against. ‘Father will be divided against son and son against father; mother against daughter and daughter against mother; and mother-in-law against daughter-in-law and daughter-in-law against mother-in-law.’”John 15:18-19, 21“If the world hates you, remember that it hated me first. The world would love you as one of its own if you belonged to it, but you are no longer part of the world. I chose you to come out of the world, so it hates you. . . . They will do all this to you because of me, for they have rejected the one who sent me.”Acts 9:1-2Meanwhile, Saul was uttering threats with every breath and was eager to kill the Lord’s followers. So he went to the high priest. He requested letters addressed to the synagogues in Damascus, asking for their cooperation in the arrest of any followers of the Way he found there. He wanted to bring them—both men and women—back to Jerusalem in chains.2 Timothy 3:12Yes, and everyone who wants to live a godly life in Christ Jesus will suffer persecution.1 Peter 4:15-16If you suffer, however, it must not be for murder, stealing, making trouble, or prying into other people’s affairs. But it is no shame to suffer for being a Christian. Praise God for the privilege of being called by his name!1 John 3:13, 15So don’t be surprised, dear brothers and sisters, if the world hates you. . . . Anyone who hates another brother or sister is really a murderer at heart. And you know that murderers don’t have eternal life within them.Following Jesus in a world that pursues evil causes hostility. Those who hate Jesus will also hate his followers. As followers of Jesus Christ, we must not respond to that hostility in kind. The evil one is our enemy—not the people he torments and twists into his service.Psalm 27:12Do not let me fall into their hands. For they accuse me of things I’ve never done; with every breath they threaten me with violence.Psalm 55:3My enemies shout at me, making loud and wicked threats. They bring trouble on me and angrily hunt me down.Psalm 69:4Those who hate me without cause outnumber the hairs on my head. Many enemies try to destroy me with lies, demanding that I give back what I didn’t steal.Psalm 109:3They surround me with hateful words and fight against me for no reason.Lamentations 3:52My enemies, whom I have never harmed, hunted me down like a bird.Hostility can also be unjust, without a specific identifiable cause. But this should not be surprising in a world that has rejected God. People may be hostile toward us because of false assumptions about us or simply because we are different from them in some way, or perhaps because of something they heard about us.

Question 2

How do I deal with those who are hostile toward me?

Accepted Answer

Psalm 3:5-6I lay down and slept, yet I woke up in safety, for the Lord was watching over me. I am not afraid of ten thousand enemies who surround me on every side.Psalm 4:8In peace I will lie down and sleep, for you alone, O Lord, will keep me safe.Psalm 27:3Though a mighty army surrounds me, my heart will not be afraid. Even if I am attacked, I will remain confident.Psalm 118:7Yes, the Lord is for me; he will help me. I will look in triumph at those who hate me.Matthew 10:28-31“Don’t be afraid of those who want to kill your body; they cannot touch your soul. Fear only God, who can destroy both soul and body in hell. What is the price of two sparrows—one copper coin? But not a single sparrow can fall to the ground without your Father knowing it. And the very hairs on your head are all numbered. So don’t be afraid; you are more valuable to God than a whole flock of sparrows.”Romans 8:31What shall we say about such wonderful things as these? If God is for us, who can ever be against us?In any conflict, we should constantly seek God’s will and make sure we are taking the right side. God is righteous and will prevail. As followers of Jesus, we must not respond to that hostility in kind. The evil one is our enemy—not the people he torments and twists into his service. Our purpose on this earth is to lead others to God in love. If we respond to hostility with hostility, we only push people further away from the One we claim to follow. Those who have full confidence in God will find that peace from an eternal perspective replaces their fear. Looking to our eternal future helps us cope better with the present.Psalm 18:17He [God] rescued me from my powerful enemies, from those who hated me and were too strong for me.Psalm 71:4My God, rescue me from the power of the wicked, from the clutches of cruel oppressors.Psalm 140:1-2, 4O Lord, rescue me from evil people. Protect me from those who are violent, those who plot evil in their hearts and stir up trouble all day long. . . . O Lord, keep me out of the hands of the wicked. Protect me from those who are violent, for they are plotting against me.When faced with unwarranted hostility, we should pray for deliverance. Our future is always in God’s hands.Job 31:29-30“Have I ever rejoiced when disaster struck my enemies, or become excited when harm came their way? No, I have never sinned by cursing anyone or by asking for revenge.”Proverbs 24:17-18Don’t rejoice when your enemies fall; don’t be happy when they stumble. For the Lord will be displeased with you and will turn his anger away from them.We should not rejoice in the misfortunes of others—even for those who are hostile to us—because that would mean that we also are giving in to hostility.Matthew 6:12-15“Forgive us our sins, as we have forgiven those who sin against us. And don’t let us yield to temptation, but rescue us from the evil one. If you forgive those who sin against you, your heavenly Father will forgive you. But if you refuse to forgive others, your Father will not forgive your sins.”Mark 11:25“But when you are praying, first forgive anyone you are holding a grudge against, so that your Father in heaven will forgive your sins, too.”Luke 11:4“Forgive us our sins, as we forgive those who sin against us. And don’t let us yield to temptation.”Luke 23:33-34When they came to a place called The Skull, they nailed him to the cross. And the criminals were also crucified—one on his right and one on his left. Jesus said, “Father, forgive them, for they don’t know what they are doing.” And the soldiers gambled for his clothes by throwing dice.Acts 7:59-60As they stoned him, Stephen prayed, “Lord Jesus, receive my spirit.” He fell to his knees, shouting, “Lord, don’t charge them with this sin!” And with that, he died.God calls us to forgive others—even our enemies. This doesn’t mean we shouldn’t stand up to our enemies when necessary. It means that we should long for their redemption even as we confront the evil in them.Exodus 23:4-5“If you come upon your enemy’s ox or donkey that has strayed away, take it back to its owner. If you see that the donkey of someone who hates you has collapsed under its load, do not walk by. Instead, stop and help.”2 Kings 6:21-23When the king of Israel saw them, he shouted to Elisha, “My father, should I kill them? Should I kill them?” “Of course not!” Elisha replied. “Do we kill prisoners of war? Give them food and drink and send them home again to their master.” So the king made a great feast for them and then sent them home to their master. After that, the Aramean raiders stayed away from the land of Israel.Proverbs 3:31Don’t envy violent people or copy their ways.Proverbs 25:21-22If your enemies are hungry, give them food to eat. If they are thirsty, give them water to drink. You will heap burning coals of shame on their heads, and the Lord will reward you.Matthew 5:38-48“You have heard the law that says the punishment must match the injury: ‘An eye for an eye, and a tooth for a tooth.’ But I say, do not resist an evil person! If someone slaps you on the right cheek, offer the other cheek also. If you are sued in court and your shirt is taken from you, give your coat, too. If a soldier demands that you carry his gear for a mile, carry it two miles. Give to those who ask, and don’t turn away from those who want to borrow. You have heard the law that says, ‘Love your neighbor’ and hate your enemy. But I say, love your enemies! Pray for those who persecute you! In that way, you will be acting as true children of your Father in heaven. For he gives his sunlight to both the evil and the good, and he sends rain on the just and the unjust alike. If you love only those who love you, what reward is there for that? Even corrupt tax collectors do that much. If you are kind only to your friends, how are you different from anyone else? Even pagans do that. But you are to be perfect, even as your Father in heaven is perfect.”Luke 6:27-29, 35“But to you who are willing to listen, I say, love your enemies! Do good to those who hate you. Bless those who curse you. Pray for those who hurt you. If someone slaps you on one cheek, offer the other cheek also. If someone demands your coat, offer your shirt also. . . . Love your enemies! Do good to them. Lend to them without expecting to be repaid. Then your reward from heaven will be very great, and you will truly be acting as children of the Most High, for he is kind to those who are unthankful and wicked.”Romans 12:14, 20-21Bless those who persecute you. Don’t curse them; pray that God will bless them. . . . Instead, “If your enemies are hungry, feed them. If they are thirsty, give them something to drink. In doing this, you will heap burning coals of shame on their heads.” Don’t let evil conquer you, but conquer evil by doing good.1 Peter 3:9Don’t repay evil for evil. Don’t retaliate with insults when people insult you. Instead, pay them back with a blessing. That is what God has called you to do, and he will grant you his blessing.If we respond to hostility with hostility, we only push people further away from the One we claim to follow. Instead, God calls us to overcome evil with good. Gentle words, acts of kindness, and even praying for our enemies have a powerful effect on reducing hostility. Better yet, these actions can be a powerful witness to lead others to faith in Christ.Acts 9:1-6Saul was uttering threats with every breath and was eager to kill the Lord’s followers. So he went to the high priest. He requested letters addressed to the synagogues in Damascus, asking for their cooperation in the arrest of any followers of the Way he found there. He wanted to bring them—both men and women—back to Jerusalem in chains. As he was approaching Damascus on this mission, a light from heaven suddenly shone down around him. He fell to the ground and heard a voice saying to him, “Saul! Saul! Why are you persecuting me?” “Who are you, lord?” Saul asked. And the voice replied, “I am Jesus, the one you are persecuting! Now get up and go into the city, and you will be told what you must do.”Galatians 1:23-24All they knew was that people were saying, “The one who used to persecute us is now preaching the very faith he tried to destroy!” And they praised God because of me.Acts 9:10-15Now there was a believer in Damascus named Ananias. The Lord spoke to him in a vision, calling, “Ananias!” “Yes, Lord!” he replied. The Lord said, “Go over to Straight Street, to the house of Judas. When you get there, ask for a man from Tarsus named Saul. He is praying to me right now. I have shown him a vision of a man named Ananias coming in and laying hands on him so he can see again.” “But Lord,” exclaimed Ananias, “I’ve heard many people talk about the terrible things this man has done to the believers in Jerusalem! And he is authorized by the leading priests to arrest everyone who calls upon your name.” But the Lord said, “Go, for Saul is my chosen instrument to take my message to the Gentiles and to kings, as well as to the people of Israel.”Someone may seem to us to be beyond God’s changing grace, but we cannot always see how God is working behind the scenes. We should allow God time to work things out in his way, follow where he leads, and be sure to give him the credit for any victory.Proverbs 15:1A gentle answer deflects anger, but harsh words make tempers flare.Proverbs 16:14The anger of the king is a deadly threat; the wise will try to appease it.Proverbs 21:14A secret gift calms anger; a bribe under the table pacifies fury.Proverbs 29:8Mockers can get a whole town agitated, but the wise will calm anger.Ecclesiastes 10:4If your boss is angry at you, don’t quit! A quiet spirit can overcome even great mistakes.In dealing with those who are hostile to us, we should respond with gentleness in both actions and words. Often, hostility falls apart against expressions of gentleness.

Question 3

How should I deal with my own hostility?

Accepted Answer

Psalm 4:4Don’t sin by letting anger control you. Think about it overnight and remain silent.Psalm 37:8Stop being angry! Turn from your rage! Do not lose your temper—it only leads to harm.Proverbs 14:29People with understanding control their anger; a hot temper shows great foolishness.Proverbs 15:1A gentle answer deflects anger, but harsh words make tempers flare.Proverbs 19:11Sensible people control their temper; they earn respect by overlooking wrongs.Proverbs 29:11Fools vent their anger, but the wise quietly hold it back.Ecclesiastes 7:9Control your temper, for anger labels you a fool.Ephesians 4:26-27And “don’t sin by letting anger control you.” Don’t let the sun go down while you are still angry, for anger gives a foothold to the devil.Ephesians 4:31Get rid of all bitterness, rage, anger, harsh words, and slander, as well as all types of evil behavior.Colossians 3:8Now is the time to get rid of anger, rage, malicious behavior, slander, and dirty language.James 1:19-20Understand this, my dear brothers and sisters: You must all be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to get angry. Human anger does not produce the righteousness God desires.In dealing with our own hostility, it is critical to recognize our anger and the dangerous consequences that that can come from it. A wise decision while angry would be to hold off on speaking too quickly or taking actions that we may later regret. And prayer can help us clear our thoughts and honor God with our actions.Leviticus 19:18“Do not seek revenge or bear a grudge against a fellow Israelite, but love your neighbor as yourself. I am the Lord.”Proverbs 24:29And don’t say, “Now I can pay them back for what they’ve done to me! I’ll get even with them!”Romans 12:17, 19Never pay back evil with more evil. Do things in such a way that everyone can see you are honorable. . . . Dear friends, never take revenge. Leave that to the righteous anger of God. For the Scriptures say, “I will take revenge; I will pay them back,” says the Lord.1 Corinthians 13:5[Love] does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged.2 Thessalonians 1:6-7In his justice he will pay back those who persecute you. And God will provide rest for you who are being persecuted and also for us when the Lord Jesus appears from heaven.1 Peter 2:12-17, 23Be careful to live properly among your unbelieving neighbors. Then even if they accuse you of doing wrong, they will see your honorable behavior, and they will give honor to God when he judges the world. . . . Respect everyone, and love the family of believers. Fear God, and respect the king. . . . He [Jesus] did not retaliate when he was insulted, nor threaten revenge when he suffered. He left his case in the hands of God, who always judges fairly.1 Peter 3:9Don’t repay evil for evil. Don’t retaliate with insults when people insult you. Instead, pay them back with a blessing. That is what God has called you to do, and he will grant you his blessing.In hostile situationg, we may be tempted to retaliate, to get revenge. But revenge never makes things even, for one person always owes the other just one more response.Proverbs 11:17Your kindness will reward you, but your cruelty will destroy you.Matthew 5:38-42“You have heard the law that says the punishment must match the injury: ‘An eye for an eye, and a tooth for a tooth.’ But I say, do not resist an evil person! If someone slaps you on the right cheek, offer the other cheek also. If you are sued in court and your shirt is taken from you, give your coat, too. If a soldier demands that you carry his gear for a mile, carry it two miles. Give to those who ask, and don’t turn away from those who want to borrow.”Mark 11:25“But when you are praying, first forgive anyone you are holding a grudge against, so that your Father in heaven will forgive your sins, too.”Luke 6:27-36“Love your enemies! Do good to those who hate you. Bless those who curse you. Pray for those who hurt you. If someone slaps you on one cheek, offer the other cheek also. If someone demands your coat, offer your shirt also. Give to anyone who asks; and when things are taken away from you, don’t try to get them back. Do to others as you would like them to do to you. If you love only those who love you, why should you get credit for that? Even sinners love those who love them! And if you do good only to those who do good to you, why should you get credit? Even sinners do that much! And if you lend money only to those who can repay you, why should you get credit? Even sinners will lend to other sinners for a full return.”2 Corinthians 2:5-11I am not overstating it when I say that the man who caused all the trouble hurt all of you more than he hurt me. Most of you opposed him, and that was punishment enough. Now, however, it is time to forgive and comfort him. Otherwise he may be overcome by discouragement. So I urge you now to reaffirm your love for him. I wrote to you as I did to test you and see if you would fully comply with my instructions. When you forgive this man, I forgive him, too. And when I forgive whatever needs to be forgiven, I do so with Christ’s authority for your benefit, so that Satan will not outsmart us. For we are familiar with his evil schemes.1 Thessalonians 5:15See that no one pays back evil for evil, but always try to do good to each other and to all people.When we are feeling hostile, we must choose to show love, kindness, and forgiveness. Then just watch as hostility softens in our own hearts and in others, too!

Question 4

What is the secret to personal peace and peace with others?

Accepted Answer

John 14:27“I am leaving you with a gift—peace of mind and heart. And the peace I give is a gift the world cannot give. So don’t be troubled or afraid.”John 16:33“I have told you all this so that you may have peace in me. Here on earth you will have many trials and sorrows. But take heart, because I have overcome the world.”Romans 8:6So letting your sinful nature control your mind leads to death. But letting the Spirit control your mind leads to life and peace.Galatians 5:22-23The Holy Spirit produces this kind of fruit in our lives: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control.Philippians 4:5-7Let everyone see that you are considerate in all you do. Remember, the Lord is coming soon. Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus.Colossians 3:15Let the peace that comes from Christ rule in your hearts. For as members of one body you are called to live in peace. And always be thankful.2 Thessalonians 3:16Now may the Lord of peace himself give you his peace at all times and in every situation.James 3:17-18The wisdom from above is first of all pure. It is also peace loving, gentle at all times, and willing to yield to others. It is full of mercy and the fruit of good deeds. It shows no favoritism and is always sincere. And those who are peacemakers will plant seeds of peace and reap a harvest of righteousness.2 Peter 1:2May God give you more and more grace and peace as you grow in your knowledge of God and Jesus our Lord.Personal peace comes from the Prince of Peace. Peace is a gift from God, experienced initially as we accept Jesus as Lord and daily as we allow his Spirit to guide us. We find peace in a personal relationship through the presence of Jesus Christ within us.Proverbs 16:7When people’s lives please the Lord, even their enemies are at peace with them.Matthew 5:9“God blesses those who work for peace, for they will be called the children of God.”Mark 9:50“Salt is good for seasoning. But if it loses its flavor, how do you make it salty again? You must have the qualities of salt among yourselves and live in peace with each other.”Romans 12:16Live in harmony with each other. Don’t be too proud to enjoy the company of ordinary people. And don’t think you know it all!Romans 12:18Do all that you can to live in peace with everyone.Ephesians 4:3Make every effort to keep yourselves united in the Spirit, binding yourselves together with peace.Hebrews 12:14Work at living in peace with everyone, and work at living a holy life, for those who are not holy will not see the Lord.1 Peter 3:11Turn away from evil and do good. Search for peace, and work to maintain it.2 Peter 3:14Do, dear friends, while you are waiting for these things to happen, make every effort to be found living peaceful lives that are pure and blameless in his sight.We should make peace a priority in our relationships—first with God, then with ourselves and others. True peace does not come from passivity. We need to work at becoming peacemakers.

Question 5

When and why might God be hostile toward us?

Accepted Answer

Psalm 5:5Therefore, the proud may not stand in your presence, for you hate all who do evil.Psalm 103:8The Lord is compassionate and merciful, slow to get angry and filled with unfailing love.Proverbs 11:23The godly can look forward to a reward, while the wicked can expect only judgment.Nahum 1:2The Lord is a jealous God, filled with vengeance and rage. He takes revenge on all who oppose him and continues to rage against his enemies!John 3:16“For this is how God loved the world: He gave his one and only Son, so that everyone who believes in him will not perish but have eternal life.”John 3:36“And anyone who believes in God’s Son has eternal life. Anyone who doesn’t obey the Son will never experience eternal life but remains under God’s angry judgment.”Acts 10:36“This is the message of Good News for the people of Israel—that there is peace with God through Jesus Christ, who is Lord of all.”Romans 1:18God shows his anger from heaven against all sinful, wicked people who suppress the truth by their wickedness.Romans 2:8He [God] will pour out his anger and wrath on those who live for themselves, who refuse to obey the truth and instead live lives of wickedness.Romans 3:25God presented Jesus as the sacrifice for sin. People are made right with God when they believe that Jesus sacrificed his life, shedding his blood. This sacrifice shows that God was being fair when he held back and did not punish those who sinned in times past,Romans 5:1Since we have been made right in God’s sight by faith, we have peace with God because of what Jesus Christ our Lord has done for us.Romans 5:8God showed his great love for us by sending Christ to die for us while we were still sinners.Ephesians 2:3All of us used to live that way, following the passionate desires and inclinations of our sinful nature. By our very nature we were subject to God’s anger, just like everyone else.Ephesians 5:6Don’t be fooled by those who try to excuse these sins, for the anger of God will fall on all who disobey him.Colossians 1:20Through him [Jesus Christ] God reconciled everything to himself. He made peace with everything in heaven and on earth by means of Christ’s blood on the cross.1 Thessalonians 5:9God chose to save us through our Lord Jesus Christ, not to pour out his anger on us.God loves all people but he also hates our sin. He is hostile toward the sin in us, and his righteousness requires him to punish it. But even while we were corrupted by sin, God still loved us enough to send Jesus to pay sin’s price. God is also hostile toward our enemy, Satan, who is constantly at work trying to get us to sin.