Question 1

Why do people complain?

Accepted Answer

Numbers 11:4-6Then the foreign rabble who were traveling with the Israelites began to crave the good things of Egypt. And the people of Israel also began to complain. “Oh, for some meat!” they exclaimed. “We remember the fish we used to eat for free in Egypt. And we had all the cucumbers, melons, leeks, onions, and garlic we wanted. But now our appetites are gone. All we ever see is this manna!”Proverbs 19:3People ruin their lives by their own foolishness and then are angry at the Lord.People complain when things don’t go their way and they don’t get what they want.

Question 2

When I complain, what does it reflect about me?

Accepted Answer

Deuteronomy 1:27-28“You complained in your tents and said, ‘The Lord must hate us. That’s why he has brought us here from Egypt—to hand us over to the Amorites to be slaughtered. Where can we go?’”Complaining demonstrates an ungrateful and selfish heart. It shows a lack of gratitude for what God has given you. It also shows a lack of trust in him to care for you. When you complain, you grumble about God!

Question 3

Is it a sin to complain?

Accepted Answer

Numbers 11:1Soon the people began to complain about their hardship, and the Lord heard everything they said. Then the Lord’s anger blazed against them, and he sent a fire to rage among them, and he destroyed some of the people in the outskirts of the camp.Numbers 14:1-2, 4Then the whole community began weeping aloud, and they cried all night. Their voices rose in a great chorus of protest against Moses and Aaron. “If only we had died in Egypt, or even here in the wilderness!” they complained. . . . Then they plotted among themselves, “Let’s choose a new leader and go back to Egypt!”Numbers 21:5-6They began to speak against God and Moses. “Why have you brought us out of Egypt to die here in the wilderness?” they complained. “There is nothing to eat here and nothing to drink. And we hate this horrible manna!” So the Lord sent poisonous snakes among the people, and many were bitten and died.Deuteronomy 6:16“You must not test the Lord your God as you did when you complained at Massah.”1 Corinthians 10:10Don’t grumble as some of them did, and then were destroyed by the angel of death.Complaining against God is a sin. It demonstrates an attitude of ungratefulness and puts God to the test by implying his actions have been unfaithful, inadequate, or even unrighteous. The Israelites had been miraculously rescued from slavery in Egypt by the living God, the very definition of perfection. Yet the minute they began to feel hungry or thirsty or fearful, they began to complain—some even wanted to return to Egypt! The Israelites’ complaints were not the cries of desperate children but amounted to insults and challenges to God, motivated by unbelief. They had decided they were dissatisfied with all God had done for them. This complaint against God was a big enough sin that he punished the Israelites severely for it.Psalm 106:25Instead, they grumbled in their tents and refused to obey the Lord.Complaining often reveals an attitude of bitterness and an intent to disobey, and influences others toward sin. When you are focused on the fact that you don’t like where you are or what you have, and you want everyone around you to know about it, you complain, spreading your ungratefulness and negativity.James 4:11Don’t speak evil against each other, dear brothers and sisters. If you criticize and judge each other, then you are criticizing and judging God’s law. But your job is to obey the law, not to judge whether it applies to you.James 5:9Don’t grumble about each other, brothers and sisters, or you will be judged. For look—the Judge is standing at the door!Complaining about others usually leads to sin because you say things about them you may later regret. It often leads to gossip and slander.

Question 4

What should I do instead of complaining?

Accepted Answer

Philippians 2:14-15Do everything without complaining and arguing, so that no one can criticize you. Live clean, innocent lives as children of God, shining like bright lights in a world full of crooked and perverse people.Instead of complaining, be kind and pure. As the old saying goes, “If you can’t say anything nice, then don’t say anything at all.” At least if you are quiet you will not contribute to negativity.Lamentations 3:39-40Then why should we, mere humans, complain when we are punished for our sins? Instead, let us test and examine our ways. Let us turn back to the Lord.Luke 6:37“Do not judge others, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn others, or it will all come back against you. Forgive others, and you will be forgiven.”Instead of complaining about your misfortunes or even the sins of others, focus on and repent of your own sins. Forgive them as you would like to be forgiven.

Question 5

To whom should I complain?

Accepted Answer

Numbers 11:10-11Moses said to the Lord, “Why are you treating me, your servant, so harshly? Have mercy on me! What did I do to deserve the burden of all these people?”Romans 11:2-4Elijah the prophet complained to God about the people of Israel and said, “Lord, they have killed your prophets and torn down your altars. I am the only one left, and now they are trying to kill me, too.” And do you remember God’s reply? He said, “No, I have 7,000 others who have never bowed down to Baal!”When the Israelites complained to each other, it accomplished nothing. Moses and Elijah took their frustrations to God, who can solve any problem. Taking your complaints to God often changes your perspective. Learn to take your problems to the one who can do something about them.

Question 6

How should I react when others complain about me?

Accepted Answer

Proverbs 15:31-32If you listen to constructive criticism, you will be at home among the wise. If you reject discipline, you only harm yourself; but if you listen to correction, you grow in understanding.1 Peter 2:23He did not retaliate when he was insulted, nor threaten revenge when he suffered. He left his case in the hands of God, who always judges fairly.1 Peter 3:9Don’t repay evil for evil. Don’t retaliate with insults when people insult you. Instead, pay them back with a blessing. That is what God has called you to do, and he will grant you his blessing.Learn to discern complaining from constructive criticism. Constructive criticism is given in a loving spirit that has your learning and growth in view. Complaints, however, are often just a harmful venting of negative emotions. In such cases, ask God for the grace to be kind and loving in spite of it all.