What should I do when I feel like blaming someone else?
Genesis 50:19-21Joseph replied, “Don’t be afraid of me. Am I God, that I can punish you? You intended to harm me, but God intended it all for good. He brought me to this position so I could save the lives of many people. No, don’t be afraid. I will continue to take care of you and your children.” So he reassured them by speaking kindly to them.
We never see the big picture until we factor in the greatness of God. Joseph’s youthful confidence (Genesis 37) led to years of severe setbacks: brotherly jealousy and betrayal, slavery, sexual harassment, and prison. At every step, Joseph refused to think God had forgotten him. His brothers now expected blame and retaliation from Joseph. But instead, they received the forgiveness of a brother who refused to blame them because God had brought so much good out of their evil.
Malachi 2:14You cry out, “Why doesn’t the Lord accept my worship?” I’ll tell you why! Because the Lord witnessed the vows you and your wife made when you were young. But you have been unfaithful to her, though she remained your faithful partner, the wife of your marriage vows.
Before we blame someone else, especially God, we should consider how we might be the cause of our problem. This may require listening to a third party who can see both sides. These people wanted to blame God for abandoning them, but God reminded them that they had sinned grievously against others. It wasn’t God who had abandoned them, but they who had abandoned God.
Micah 6:8O people, the Lord has told you what is good, and this is what he requires of you: to do what is right, to love mercy, and to walk humbly with your God.
Each of God’s three requirements in this passage can be applied when we are tempted to blame others. It is never right to wrongly blame others. We lack mercy when we blame others. We are not exercising humility when we blame others. When we are tempted to blame, we are also being tempted to ignore God and his instructions.
James 5:9Don’t grumble about each other, brothers and sisters, or you will be judged. For look—the Judge is standing at the door!
Complaints are often thinly veiled blaming. Grumbling may sometimes seem to express shared responsibility for problems, but it usually involves holding others more responsible than ourselves. James helpfully reminds believers that the God who sees everything perfectly—including our intentions and hidden motives—will hold us responsible for our failure to admit our mistakes.
Ezekiel 18:25-29“You say, ‘The Lord isn’t doing what’s right!’ Listen to me, O people of Israel. Am I the one not doing what’s right, or is it you? When righteous people turn from their righteous behavior and start doing sinful things, they will die for it. Yes, they will die because of their sinful deeds. And if wicked people turn from their wickedness, obey the law, and do what is just and right, they will save their lives. They will live because they thought it over and decided to turn from their sins. Such people will not die. And yet the people of Israel keep saying, ‘The Lord isn’t doing what’s right!’ O people of Israel, it is you who are not doing what’s right, not I.”
Blaming God puts us in the dangerous and irrational position of judging God. When creatures think they can hold their Creator responsible, they betray an extremely flawed understanding of the one who made them. Ezekiel was confronting people who questioned both God’s judgment of people who had turned away and God’s forgiveness of people who turned back. We are always on dangerous ground when we try to shift responsibility for error from ourselves to God.
