What should I do when I am to blame?

Jonah 1:10-12The sailors were terrified when they heard this, for [Jonah] had already told them he was running away from the Lord. “Oh, why did you do it?” they groaned. And since the storm was getting worse all the time, they asked him, “What should we do to you to stop this storm?” “Throw me into the sea,” Jonah said, “and it will become calm again. I know that this terrible storm is all my fault.”

We must take responsibility for our thoughts and actions and accept the blame we deserve without seeking to divert it to others. When we earn blame, we need to own it. Jonah not only accepted responsibility but also demonstrated his acceptance by giving others a plan that cost him. He put his life into their hands.

Genesis 3:12-13The man replied, “It was the woman you gave me who gave me the fruit, and I ate it.” Then the Lord God asked the woman, “What have you done?” “The serpent deceived me,” she replied. “That’s why I ate it.”

We frequently want to blame others for our sin. But God knows our hearts and is not fooled by our attempts to take the spotlight off our sin. Blaming others for our own wrongdoing compounds the sin we have done.

2 Samuel 12:13David confessed to Nathan, “I have sinned against the Lord.” Nathan replied, “Yes, but the Lord has forgiven you, and you won’t die for this sin.”

One of the evidences of David’s godly character is that he listened and submitted to trusted intervention. The prophet Nathan risked his own life by confronting the king about a series of sins. But David finally faced the truth that had been haunting him for months. His confession was immediately met both with Nathan’s assurance of forgiveness and with an honest reminder about the inevitable consequences of sin. Blaming others prevents us from ever experiencing the benefits of hearing the truth.

Psalm 32:5Finally, I confessed all my sins to you and stopped trying to hide my guilt. I said to myself, “I will confess my rebellion to the Lord.” And you forgave me! All my guilt is gone.

We know enough of David’s life to realize that he was well acquainted with guilt. He didn’t always deal with it quickly; God sometimes had to confront him. But David always had a moment of surrender. And when he repented, he did so wholeheartedly. The extent of our freedom from guilt depends on the depth of our repentance.

Psalm 51:3-7I recognize my rebellion; it haunts me day and night. Against you, and you alone, have I sinned; I have done what is evil in your sight. You will be proved right in what you say, and your judgment against me is just. For I was born a sinner—yes, from the moment my mother conceived me. But you desire honesty from the womb, teaching me wisdom even there. Purify me from my sins, and I will be clean; wash me, and I will be whiter than snow.

This entire psalm represents David’s thoughtful and thorough repentance of his sin with Bathsheba and the other sins that followed. Accepting deserved blame and confessing our sins to God in detail leads to cleansing. Confess your sin to God and receive his forgiveness. When you are wrong, trying to shift the blame will not remove your sense of guilt. Only your repentance and God’s forgiveness will.