People Pleasing

I’m not trying to win the approval of people, but of God. If pleasing people were my goal, I would not be Christ’s servant.

Galatians 1:10

I was born with people-pleasing DNA! I’m sure of it! I imagine you may share some of the same markers.

Why is it that we feel guilty saying no to an activity? For me it’s because I want the person I’m declining to think highly of me. Deep down, I am afraid I won’t look as unselfish or helpful if I answer with a gracious no instead of an enthusiastic yes.

One Sunday after church I was asked to make a meal for a precious God’s girl who had just had a baby. I couldn’t do it because of my traveling schedule, but I really wanted the person who asked me to know that I had gone to the baby shower and given her several gifts, and since I had just spoken at a weekend retreat, I needed to make a meal for my family! I was pooped.

That afternoon I was in a terrible mood and finally asked my husband what was wrong with me. He said, “I’ll tell you what’s wrong. You are too concerned about what so-and-so is thinking because you said no to making a meal this time.” He was right!

Right then and there I asked God to forgive me. My desire to impress got in the way, and I turned a simple request for a meal into a struggle about my self-worth. I want to live daily to please the Lord more than live looking accomplished and capable to other people.

Whether your plate is full or not, next time someone asks you to commit to something, be slow to speak. If you’re impulsive like me, ask him or her to give you time to check your schedule. Do a quick heart check—“Lord, am I doing this to please You in love and obedience, or just to be a people pleaser?”