Rediscovering Love

Rediscovering Love

Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance.

1 Corinthians 13:4-7

COUPLES OFTEN COME to me in the midst of marriage difficulty, even at the point of separating. When I ask why they are considering such a step, they share their points of contention and conclude with the statement “We just don’t love each other anymore.” They say they have simply “lost” their love, and it’s beyond their control. I don’t believe that. I’ll agree that they may have lost their warm romantic feelings, but real love is another matter.

The Bible makes some strong statements about love within marriage. In Ephesians 5:25, husbands are commanded to love their wives. In Titus 2:4, wives are told that they must learn to love their husbands. Anything that can be commanded, and anything that can be taught and learned, is not beyond our control.

First Corinthians 13 describes love as being patient and kind, not arrogant or rude. It describes love as refusing to keep a score of wrongs and never holding on to grudges. These words are not describing a feeling. Rather, they are talking about the way we think and behave. We can love each other without having the “tingles” for each other. In fact, the fastest way to see our emotions return is to start loving each other by acting in accordance with the above passage from 1 Corinthians 13.

Heavenly Father, thank you for the beautiful definition of love you gave us through the apostle Paul. It’s a challenging one, and sometimes I wonder how I can ever live up to it. Please help me. As I commit to acting on these words, please teach me the right way to love my spouse.

Learning to Love