Love As Action

Love as Action

Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance.

1 Corinthians 13:4-7

BRENT CONFIDED IN ME, “I just don’t love her anymore. I haven’t loved her for a long time. I don’t want to hurt her, but I don’t enjoy being with her anymore. I don’t know what happened. I wish it were different, but I don’t have any feelings for her.”

Brent was thinking and feeling what thousands have thought and felt through the years. It’s the “I don’t love him or her anymore” mind-set that gives men and women the freedom—at least in their minds—to seek love with someone else.

It’s worth taking another look at the apostle Paul’s famous “definition” of love in 1 Corinthians 13. In this passage, the focus is all on attitude and action—not on feelings. For example, enduring through every circumstance and not demanding our own way pretty much require that we’re not overly focused on our emotions. But when we act in a loving way, often the emotions will follow.

Brent had never made the distinction between the two stages of romantic love. In stage one, the feelings are euphoric and without effort. In stage two, action is the key. Can Brent’s marriage be saved? Yes, if he and his wife will confess past failures and agree to speak love in a language the other person understands. In stage two, loving actions precede loving feelings.

Lord Jesus, thank you for this reminder that true, godly love is more about the way I act than about the way I feel. Sometimes it’s hard to act in a loving way when I don’t feel like doing it. But please give me the will and the courage to express my love to my mate.

Choice