Dealing With Irresponsibility

Dealing with Irresponsibility

Pay careful attention to your own work, for then you will get the satisfaction of a job well done, and you won’t need to compare yourself to anyone else. For we are each responsible for our own conduct.

Galatians 6:4-5

WHY ARE SOME HUSBANDS and wives irresponsible? When we get married, we expect that our spouse will carry his or her part of the load. But if your spouse won’t work, shows no interest in parenting, and ignores you, you have a problem. The Bible makes it clear that each of us should be responsible for our own behavior and our own work. Marriage partners are on the same team, but if one half of the team isn’t contributing, the team doesn’t function. If that’s your situation, you must first understand the source of the behavior. Let me suggest some possibilities. An irresponsible spouse may be

1. following the model of a parent.
2. rebelling against the model of a parent.
3. exhibiting a self-centered attitude.
4. expressing resentment toward his or her mate.

How do you discover the source of your spouse’s behavior? You ask questions. Not direct questions such as, “Why are you so irresponsible?” but probing questions such as, “What kind of relationship did you have with your father?” Or, “In what ways have my words or actions hurt you most?” When you begin that dialogue and receive honest responses, you are on the road to understanding your spouse. That’s the first step to dealing with irresponsibility.

Father God, you know that when I see irresponsibility in my spouse, it frustrates me, and I don’t always respond well. Please help me to take a step back and do my best to understand the root cause of this behavior. Show me the right questions to ask, and give me ears to hear the answers.

Irresponsibility