What Mammaw Said - Kill ’em With Kindness

What Mammaw Said - Kill ’Em with Kindness

LIKE ALL PRETEEN GIRLS, I had my share of hurt feelings growing up. Whenever I had issues with my friends, I would go to Mammaw for comfort. I’m not sure why I kept doing this, because she never once allowed me to wallow in my brokenness or swim in my despair. She wouldn’t be my accomplice in fantasizing on how to get back at those hateful little pigtailed brats either.

When I wanted to be avenged, she would only say, with a sweet smile and soft voice, “Kill ’em with kindness.”

Mammaw’s theory was that we must—every day—take the high road. Mammaw had lived her entire life in one little country town and had an impeccable reputation. This is a hard thing to do—live in one place for over ninety years without anyone ever saying one bad thing about you. I know I couldn’t do it. But Mammaw accomplished this because she always took the high road. She believed that doing so left your adversaries with nothing to attack you with and left your conscience clear.

Never pay back evil with more evil. Do things in such a way that everyone can see you are honorable. Do all that you can to live in peace with everyone. Dear friends, never take revenge. Leave that to the righteous anger of God. For the Scriptures say, “I will take revenge; I will pay them back,” says the LORD. (Romans 12:17-19)

Mammaw explained to me that those who have given their lives to Christ are highly blessed to be called his lambs. We have an obligation to act as Jesus would act, she told me, not as we’re tempted by the world to act. Mammaw instinctively lived by the old saying, “Be careful how you live. You might be the only Bible some people ever read.” At the same time, she told me about the bonus of being kind to those who attacked me: my adversaries would be frustrated to no end.

I never said that Mammaw wasn’t strategic.