Sticks And Stones - Kindness And Fondness Are Mutually Exclusive

Sticks and Stones - Kindness and Fondness Are Mutually Exclusive

Kindness is in our power, even when fondness is not. —Samuel Johnson

OH, PLEASE. This quote drives me crazy because it always seems to come to mind when I so want to be rude. Let me give you an example.

I have this huge pet peeve about how the airline industry treats their customers. I could fill an entire chapter with true and bizarre stories of the most hateful, rude “customer service” experiences I’ve both endured and witnessed. But that doesn’t give me a pass on being kind.

When I walk up to the gate and am glared at by a cynical, burned-out ticket agent, I smile my biggest, brightest eight-tooth smile (see my picture on the back cover). Sometimes I get an eight-tooth reflection. Usually I get no eye contact and a request for my ID. It doesn’t matter. My job is to be kind in this situation, even though fondness for this person evades me.

When I step on the plane and the flight attendants look like they’d rather be anywhere in the world than on that plane, in that airport, I greet them with a heartfelt “good morning,” or “good afternoon.” Sometimes I get a warm response, but mostly they pretend they didn’t hear me. It doesn’t matter. In the absence of fondness for these folks, it is still my responsibility to be kind.

When I leave the plane and the captain is standing at the door, arms folded and eyes cast to the back of the plane just waiting for these poky passengers (in other industries we’re called customers) to get off the plane, I always thank him or her. Only about twenty times in my last fifteen years of flying (and I have flown well over 2 million miles) have I had a pilot respond while making eye contact. Scary that this is how airlines often treat their customers. But it doesn’t matter. My role in this relationship is to be kind.

Since God chose you to be the holy people he loves, you must clothe yourselves with tenderhearted mercy, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience. Make allowance for each other’s faults, and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others. (Colossians 3:12-13)

So often we feel that we are not obligated to be polite when others mistreat us, but that’s not true. As Mr. Johnson said, “Kindness is in our power, even when fondness is not.” Oh, please.