Lessons From Mom

I GREW UP A WORRIED little child, whether it was about a real situation I was dealing with or a problem I had worked up in my imagination. Whatever I was worried about, my mom’s antidote was always the same: prayer.

• Your ear hurts? Let’s pray.
• You’re scared of a house fire after the fire department demonstration at school? Let’s pray.
• Your sister is being mean? Let’s pray.

I grew up knowing that God cared about me and that I could turn to him for everything simply because that’s what my mom lived out. Nothing was too small or too big for God. I would not be the woman I am today and I don’t think I’d have the faith I have today without her influence.

But if you were thinking my mom was some picture-perfect mom who baked cookies every day, quoted a verse for every issue, and had a calm voice every time I did something dumb, you’d be wrong.

My mom taught me how to pray, but she also taught me how to cuss.

We never had any formal swearing lessons, but this Bible-ready prayer warrior also let words fly when she stubbed her toe, when something spilled, or when plans went haywire. I didn’t escape the influence of her words. In fact, I inherited that potty mouth honestly.

Now that I’m a mom, I’ve felt the burden of wondering if I’m totally and completely screwing up my kids. Sometimes I feel like I’m just closing my eyes and hoping the good things will stick and the bad things will be forgotten. It’s this mind-set that can leave me with crushing disappointment the moment my child starts developing a fear I know she saw first in me or the moment she turns to a heap of sugary goodness or screens to find comfort, the way I do sometimes.

Here’s what I want you to know though: the language of my mom’s prayers sank deeper into my soul than those four-letter words did. As we strive to be perfect mommas, with all the best of intentions, we have to remember we will never be perfect. And thank goodness, God never asked us to be. Here’s what he did ask us to do: “Love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might. And these words that I command you today shall be on your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise” (Deuteronomy 6:5-7, ESV).

These verses are a call to teach our kids about the Lord—and to live it out. My momma did that well. When I look back on my childhood, sure, I remember the choice words. But I overwhelmingly remember the prayers and how they impacted my entire life. I learned how to cuss, but I also learned how to pray and ask forgiveness from a loving God who cared enough to hear me confess the four-letter word I voiced in frustration.

There’s so much grace in this passage from Deuteronomy. It doesn’t call us to be perfect; it instructs us to constantly turn our hearts back to the one who is. Honestly, if our focus is on being perfect, even if we’re doing it in the name of Jesus, it pulls the focus away from God and back onto ourselves.

We’re going to get some things wrong as moms. We’re going to accidentally teach our kids to be fearful or pessimistic or impatient simply by living those things out in front of them. Of course, we hope that we’re being transformed by truth and that they will learn amazing things through how we live too, but we can’t beat ourselves up for the cracks that will inevitably happen.

When my kids make the same kinds of mistakes I do, I hope they won’t strive to fix their mistakes apart from Christ. Instead, I want them to run headlong into the grace of a God they know, because that’s what Momma did with her mistakes.

ACTION STEP

Ask yourself the following questions: What am I pouring my energy into when it comes to what I teach my kids? Am I focusing on the things that matter most? Am I teaching them about the Lord, or am I too distracted by my own failures?

PRAYER

Lord, today I come to you with a short and sweet request: let my mistakes point my kids to you. In Jesus’ name, amen.

MORNING QUESTIONS

TAKEAWAY TODAY | What good things did you learn from your mom? What bad habits did you learn from her?

What spiritual legacy are you leaving for your kids?

DREADING TODAY | Is there anything you’re dreading today?

REDEFINING TODAY | If so, what is another way you can view that thing you’re dreading?

ASKING GOD TODAY | What request are you bringing before the Lord today?

EVENING QUESTIONS

REFLECTION | In what ways did you and your kids experience God’s grace today?

LITTLE VICTORIES | Where did you see God show up even in small ways, reminding you that you aren’t alone?

WHITE FLAG MOMENTS | When did you want to hide or escape today?

MEMORY OF THE DAY | What do you want to relish and thank God for?