Break The Cycle

I GET MYSELF INTO the craziest of pickles. Well, that’s the nice way to put it. It’s more like a downward spiral that never seems to hit bottom.

Over the last few weeks, I’ve been sprinting into dumb decisions—ones I know are not the way to abundance in my life. Yet I keep choosing them. For me it looks like this: I stay up way too late reading about the latest royal gossip or Hollywood breakup (I can’t believe I just admitted that). I regret going to bed late, and I end up waking up late and missing quiet time with the Lord. I feel sluggish and too tired to take my vitamins and eat good food, making me feel even more sluggish, so I sit the girls in front of the TV and plop myself on the couch instead of engaging their minds or prepping dinner. By late afternoon, we have a messy house, grouchy kids, an exhausted mom, and no dinner in sight. This pushes back bedtime again, leaving less than adequate time to get ready for the next day or to spend quality time with the man I love. I end the night guilt ridden, bemoaning my bad choices and drowning my sorrows in social media, only to go to bed late and repeat the cycle all over again.

It kills me that I keep doing this, because I know better. But it’s a hard cycle to break. Not today, though. It was only by the skin of my teeth, but I did it. Nap time rolled around, and although I had plenty of work to do and my littlest was refusing to lie down in her crib, I picked up that Bible that’s been collecting dust all week and I chose the good.

What’s crazy is that I almost convinced myself to take care of the laundry instead of meet with my heavenly Father. I spent half an episode of a comedy show folding towels. Now, there’s nothing inherently wrong with watching a show (or folding laundry, for that matter). In that moment, though, I knew I was dodging God and choosing everything but him.

My exit ramp from the cycle was to spend time with the Lord to realign my thoughts to his truth. I needed to stop the narrative that my life was really hard and that I wasn’t capable of handling it all. I needed to stop defining myself with words that should never define someone who is wrapped in the righteousness of Christ.

It was the smallest of choices, but it shifted everything and generated even more good choices. As I read the Word, this verse caught my attention: “Turn my eyes from worthless things, and give me life through your word” (Psalm 119:37). That’s pretty direct, isn’t it? Sometimes I need it straight. And sometimes I need to literally turn my eyes from worthless things and go to the Word.

Vana is in a phase where she has a hard time holding still long enough to hear what I’m saying. Many days I have to hold her chubby little cheeks in my hands until I have her attention. Inevitably, though, her eyes dart to the side, and I’m sitting there thinking how silly she is to work sooooo hard to look away from me when I’m in her line of vision. I wonder how silly God thinks I am when I keep my eyes on the royal wedding instead of on the truth in his Word that reminds me I’m the daughter of the King.

It’s time for us to commit right now to taking the first exit ramp out of those cycles that distance us from God’s best for our lives—and ultimately from God himself. The good news is that there are opportunities throughout the day to break the cycle of whatever is keeping us in a pattern of bad choices. Let’s rejoice in the fact that we aren’t bound to remain in our downward spiral—God has lined the path of distraction with exit ramps.

ACTION STEP

Meditate on Psalm 119:10 (the Amplified version is my favorite for this passage), and break the cycle right here, right now. Make one small choice that will break whatever funk you are in.

PRAYER

Father, turn my eyes from worthless things and give me life through your Word. Give me an alertness to the next exit ramp and help me to walk in obedience to take it. In Jesus’ name, amen.

MORNING QUESTIONS

TAKEAWAY TODAY | What does your typical downward spiral look like?

Can you think of a time when God met you in his Word and broke the cycle you were stuck in?

DREADING TODAY | Is there anything you’re dreading today?

REDEFINING TODAY | If so, what is another way you can view that thing you’re dreading?

ASKING GOD TODAY | What request are you bringing before the Lord today?

EVENING QUESTIONS

REFLECTION | What exit ramps did the Lord provide for you today? How did you respond?

LITTLE VICTORIES | Where did you see God show up even in small ways, reminding you that you aren’t alone?

WHITE FLAG MOMENTS | When did you want to hide or escape today?

MEMORY OF THE DAY | What do you want to relish and thank God for?