When God Hurts Your Feelings

When God Hurts Your Feelings

Lysa TerKeurst

Has God ever hurt your feelings? Honestly, sometimes these verses from Philippians are a tough pill to swallow.

Content in any and every situation? Really?

Several years ago, my daughter was a state champion gymnast. She was beautiful, graceful, and captivating to watch. One night while practicing for one of the largest tournaments she’d ever compete in, she fell. It was a move she’d done hundreds of times with the greatest of ease. But this time something went terribly wrong and that one mistake ended her gymnastic dreams.

We spent a year going from doctor to doctor only to be told she’d never be able to support the weight of her body on her injured shoulder again.

This was heart wrenching. Watching a fourteen-year-old girl wrestle with the fact that her dreams were stripped away doesn’t exactly lend itself to feelings of contentment. Now, I know in the grand scheme of life, people face much worse situations. But in her world, this was huge. It was tempting to wallow and tell God He’d hurt our feelings.

Why did this happen?

Why didn’t You stop this, God?

Why weren’t my prayers answered?

Have you been there? Have you ever had a big situation in your life where you just couldn’t process why God would allow it to happen? Or maybe even a small annoyance, like losing your keys on a morning you really needed to be somewhere?

It’s so tempting to wallow in the why.

Asking why is perfectly normal. Asking why isn’t unspiritual. However, if asking why pushes us farther from God rather than drawing us closer to Him, it is the wrong question.

If asking why doesn’t offer hope, what will?

The what question.

In other words: Now that this is my reality, what am I supposed to do with it?

When I need to refocus my thinking from the why to the what, I rely on the apostle Paul’s wisdom: “Whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things” (Philippians 4:8). I call this verse “directions on where to park my mind.”

And that’s exactly what Ashley has had to do with her dashed gymnastics dreams. Instead of wallowing in why this happened, I’ve had to help her ask:

This is my reality; now what am I going to do with it?

What can I learn from this?

What part of this is for my protection?

What other opportunities could God be providing?

What maturity could God be building into me?

Switching from the why to the what question paves the road to parking our minds in a much better place.

Is it easy? Nope. But is it a way to find perspective for situations we feel God has allowed into our lives that we don’t understand and absolutely don’t like? Yes.

Dear Lord, I know You love me. But sometimes it’s just hard to understand the circumstances that come my way. I find myself consumed with trying to figure things out rather than looking for Your perspective and trusting You. Thank You for this new way to look at things. In Jesus’ name, Amen.

REMEMBER

Switching from the why to the what question paves the road to parking your mind in a much better place.

REFLECT

Refocus your thinking from the why to the what by relying on the apostle Paul’s wisdom: “Whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things” (Philippians 4:8).

RESPOND

Recall a recent experience that prompted you to ask the why question. Use the what questions from the devotion to park your mind in a better place by looking for the ways in which God may be teaching, protecting, providing for, and maturing you.

POWER VERSES

Isaiah 55:8–9; 2 Corinthians 10:5