Finding Friends

Faithful are the wounds of a friend, But the kisses of an enemy are deceitful.

Proverbs 27:6

Some friends are willing to wound you in order to help you: “Faithful are the wounds of a friend, but the kisses of an enemy are deceitful” (Proverbs 27:6). Consider the last part of the verse—the characteristics of an “enemy.” Essentially, what to be on the watch for is the flattering lips of a deceiver.

A person who constantly compliments you may not be a faithful friend. The wise person will quickly ask, “Why is this person saying all these nice things?” Sometimes that person has a hidden agenda. Perhaps they want something or are so insecure that fawning over people is the only way they know to find a friend.

So how do you find a faithful friend without being taken in by a flatterer or deceiver? Faithful friends edify, but they don’t flatter (Romans 15:2). They are humble and demonstrate love (Ephesians 4:2). They don’t always tell you what you want to hear. Instead, they are willing to rebuke you if necessary out of love for you (Proverbs 9:8).

Everyone needs to be close to someone who will ask them the hard questions about their lives. A faithful friend will ask those questions and not rest until he gets the right answers.