God Is Listening

My life is poured out like water, and all my bones are out of joint. My heart is like wax, melting within me.

There’s a popular acronym to describe oversharing these days—TMI. Too. Much. Information. If you share about your gastrointestinal distress at the dinner table, TMI. If you start talking about the details of your latest bunion surgery during a friend’s birthday party, TMI. If you mention you’re grieving months after your person’s death, TMI. Nobody wants to hear all that.

It doesn’t take long after your person’s death to realize that there are some folks who can hear your story and others who can’t. Some friends are equipped to listen to the blow-by-blow account of orchestrating a funeral or closing credit card accounts. Others weary of the details. Some family members welcome your expressions of sadness. Others can’t seem to handle any talk of grief. TMI. Too. Much. Information. It can be really tough to discover this reality after loss. Not every person in your life can walk with you through this hard time.

When David wrote Psalm 22, he was in a real state of TMI. He’s struggling with low self-image (verse 6). He feels abandoned by his circle of support (verse 11). But it doesn’t stop there. David rattles off a laundry list of personal ailments that would make dinner party guests cringe—body aches, weakness, dry mouth, unhealthy weight loss. We read David’s complaints and feel for him. Yet this is a psalm written for worship, to be sung by the congregation to a tune called “Doe of the Dawn.” Doesn’t he know these things aren’t polite to share in public? Too. Much. Information.

David’s oversharing isn’t to be pitied, however. Instead, it should be praised. While David’s friends don’t seem willing to listen to his plight anymore, God’s ears are always open. David has selected the perfect audience to whom he can complain and vent. In perfect love, God can receive all that David needs to get off his chest. There’s nothing David can say that will make God love him less. There’s no struggle David can share that will make God embarrassed or cringey. Instead, David pours out his heart to God with full-faced honesty, knowing that God cares, listens, and loves him through everything he’s enduring.

As you cope with your loss, you may find that friends shy away from the details you wish to share. It may sometimes be tough to find a listening ear, even when you have a great circle of support. As you learn where and how to share your story best, remember that God is one person to whom you can give all the details. He knows your grief and loss and desires your company. There’s no such thing as too much information with God.

The LORD is near to all who call on him, to all who call on him in truth.

You keep track of all my sorrows. You have collected all my tears in your bottle. You have recorded each one in your book.

A Prayer: God, sometimes I feel like nobody wants to hear from me anymore. They only want the happy me that used to be. They’re weary of hearing the details of my loss. Thank you, God, that you never grow tired of hearing from me. Thank you for letting me weep, ask questions, and complain to you. Your faithful presence reminds me that I am never truly alone, even when it feels like I’ve got no one left to talk to. Encourage me today with your presence. Remind me that you’re listening and you love me. Amen.

An Activity for Today: Grief can make you feel like you’re the only one with your kind of sadness. However, while grief is unique, it’s also universal. Through the beauty of the internet, we can connect with others who have experienced similar losses and find comfort and solidarity as we grieve and grow. Today, do an internet search to find a local or online community of grievers who are mourning similar losses to yours. Search according to who you are (sibling, friend, parent, etc.) or how your person died (suicide, Alzheimer’s, cancer, etc.). The following are just a few examples of possible connection and support:

• SiblingGriefClub.com for bereaved adult siblings
• CompassionateFriends.org for families grieving the death of a child
• TheDinnerParty.org for twenty- and thirtysomethings who have lost a loved one
• ModernWidowsClub.com for widows
• RefugeWidowers.com for widowed men

A Song to Encourage Your Heart: “God Is Listening” by Gohar Almas