How does selflessness transform relationships?

Exodus 2:17Some other shepherds came and chased them away. So Moses jumped up and rescued the girls from the shepherds. Then he drew water for their flocks.

Exodus 32:31-32So Moses returned to the Lord and said, “Oh, what a terrible sin these people have committed. They have made gods of gold for themselves. But now, if you will only forgive their sin—but if not, erase my name from the record you have written!”

1 Chronicles 21:17David said to God, “I am the one who called for the census! I am the one who has sinned and done wrong! But these people are as innocent as sheep—what have they done? O Lord my God, let your anger fall against me and my family, but do not destroy your people.”

1 Corinthians 9:19-23I try to find common ground with everyone, doing everything I can to save some. I do everything to spread the Good News and share in its blessings.

1 Corinthians 10:32-33Don’t give offense to Jews or Gentiles or the church of God. I, too, try to please everyone in everything I do. I don’t just do what is best for me; I do what is best for others so that many may be saved.

Selflessness positively affects our relationships as we seek the salvation of others. It opens doors with people that might otherwise remain closed.

Ruth 1:8, 11-12, 16-17On the way, Naomi said to her two daughters-in-law, “Go back to your mothers’ homes. And may the Lord reward you for your kindness to your husbands and to me. . . . But Naomi replied, “Why should you go on with me? Can I still give birth to other sons who could grow up to be your husbands? No, my daughters, return to your parents’ homes, for I am too old to marry again. And even if it were possible, and I were to get married tonight and bear sons, then what? . . . But Ruth replied, “Don’t ask me to leave you and turn back. Wherever you go, I will go; wherever you live, I will live. Your people will be my people, and your God will be my God. Wherever you die, I will die, and there I will be buried. May the Lord punish me severely if I allow anything but death to separate us!”

Selflessness positively affects our relationships by encouraging greater mutual devotion.

Luke 14:7-11When Jesus noticed that all who had come to the dinner were trying to sit in the seats of honor near the head of the table, he gave them this advice: “When you are invited to a wedding feast, don’t sit in the seat of honor. What if someone who is more distinguished than you has also been invited? The host will come and say, ‘Give this person your seat.’ Then you will be embarrassed, and you will have to take whatever seat is left at the foot of the table! “Instead, take the lowest place at the foot of the table. Then when your host sees you, he will come and say, ‘Friend, we have a better place for you!’ Then you will be honored in front of all the other guests. For those who exalt themselves will be humbled, and those who humble themselves will be exalted.”

Selflessness positively affects our relationships by honoring others while not insisting on being honored.

1 Corinthians 10:24Don’t be concerned for your own good but for the good of others.

Galatians 6:2Share each other’s burdens, and in this way obey the law of Christ.

Selflessness positively affects our relationships by turning our focus to concern for others. Life in a fallen world convinces most people that others don’t actually care. Selfless and even anonymous caring can lead onlookers to ask questions and often serve as powerful pointers toward God.

Acts 4:32-37All the believers were united in heart and mind. And they felt that what they owned was not their own, so they shared everything they had. . . . There were no needy people among them, because those who owned land or houses would sell them and bring the money to the apostles to give to those in need.

Selflessness positively affects our relationships by meeting the needs of others and allowing them to meet our needs. Fellowship is mutual selflessness.

Genesis 13:8-9Abram said to Lot, “Let’s not allow this conflict to come between us or our herdsmen. After all, we are close relatives! The whole countryside is open to you. Take your choice of any section of the land you want, and we will separate. If you want the land to the left, then I’ll take the land on the right. If you prefer the land on the right, then I’ll go to the left.”

Selflessness positively affects our relationships by prioritizing peace over selfish ambition in resolving conflicts.