Question 1

Why is our presence vital to our relationships?

Accepted Answer

Proverbs 27:10Never abandon a friend—either yours or your father’s. When disaster strikes, you won’t have to ask your brother for assistance. It’s better to go to a neighbor than to a brother who lives far away.Ecclesiastes 4:9-10Two people are better off than one, for they can help each other succeed. If one person falls, the other can reach out and help. But someone who falls alone is in real trouble.John 14:23Jesus replied, “All who love me will do what I say. My Father will love them, and we will come and make our home with each of them.”John 15:13-15“There is no greater love than to lay down one’s life for one’s friends. You are my friends if you do what I command. I no longer call you slaves, because a master doesn’t confide in his slaves. Now you are my friends, since I have told you everything the Father told me.”1 John 4:11-17Since God loved us that much, we surely ought to love each other. No one has ever seen God. But if we love each other, God lives in us, and his love is brought to full expression in us. And God has given us his Spirit as proof that we live in him and he in us. Furthermore, we have seen with our own eyes and now testify that the Father sent his Son to be the Savior of the world. All who confess that Jesus is the Son of God have God living in them, and they live in God. We know how much God loves us, and we have put our trust in his love. God is love, and all who live in love live in God, and God lives in them. And as we live in God, our love grows more perfect. So we will not be afraid on the day of judgment, but we can face him with confidence because we live like Jesus here in this world.Our presence provides physical support to others. Two can form a team and accomplish much more than the two independently. Presence makes friendship possible and reinforces existing friendship. Without presence, relationships are difficult to maintain. As our Creator, Jesus has the right to consider us objects or slaves, but he chooses to call us and treat us as friends, giving weight to our presence. His promise to dwell in us means that we can experience his very presence in our lives.Genesis 45:15Then Joseph kissed each of his brothers and wept over them, and after that they began talking freely with him.Job 2:11-13Three of Job’s friends . . . traveled from their homes to comfort and console him. . . . When they saw Job from a distance, they scarcely recognized him. Wailing loudly, they tore their robes and threw dust into the air over their heads to show their grief. Then they sat on the ground with him for seven days and nights. No one said a word to Job, for they saw that his suffering was too great for words.Job 42:11Then all his [Job’s] brothers, sisters, and former friends came and feasted with him in his home. And they consoled him and comforted him because of all the trials the Lord had brought against him. And each of them brought him a gift of money and a gold ring.Romans 1:10-12One of the things I always pray for is the opportunity, God willing, to come at last to see you. For I long to visit you so I can bring you some spiritual gift that will help you grow strong in the Lord. When we get together, I want to encourage you in your faith, but I also want to be encouraged by yours.2 Corinthians 7:6God, who encourages those who are discouraged, encouraged us by the arrival of Titus.Our presence provides emotional support to others. When we need a lift emotionally, an inanimate object doesn’t do much for us. It takes a smile, a kind word, a hug, a touch from someone who cares. Presence usually promotes mutual encouraging benefits.Psalm 34:3Come, let us tell of the Lord’s greatness; let us exalt his name together.Matthew 26:38He [Jesus] told them, “My soul is crushed with grief to the point of death. Stay here and keep watch with me.”Mark 3:13-14Afterward Jesus went up on a mountain and called out the ones he wanted to go with him. And they came to him. Then he appointed twelve of them and called them his apostles. They were to accompany him, and he would send them out to preach.Acts 1:14They all met together and were constantly united in prayer, along with Mary the mother of Jesus, several other women, and the brothers of Jesus.While we usually think about Jesus’ subjection to temptation as the primary way he experienced his humanity, it’s worth reflecting on the other basic human needs Jesus experienced: hunger, sadness, thirst, and a longing for companionship. His disciples were first his close companions before he sent them out.Acts 2:42-47All the believers devoted themselves to the apostles’ teaching, and to fellowship, and to sharing in meals (including the Lord’s Supper), and to prayer. A deep sense of awe came over them all, and the apostles performed many miraculous signs and wonders. And all the believers met together in one place and shared everything they had. They sold their property and possessions and shared the money with those in need. They worshiped together at the Temple each day, met in homes for the Lord’s Supper, and shared their meals with great joy and generosity—all the while praising God and enjoying the goodwill of all the people. And each day the Lord added to their fellowship those who were being saved.Hebrews 10:25Let us not neglect our meeting together, as some people do, but encourage one another, especially now that the day of his return is drawing near.Our presence provides spiritual support to others. As God’s people we are there to bring others into God’s presence or to bring God’s presence to them. The early believers instinctively realized the importance of being together, worshiping together, and working for Christ together.

Question 2

How can we be present in the lives of those we love?

Accepted Answer

Job 2:11-13When three of Job’s friends heard of the tragedy he had suffered, they got together and traveled from their homes to comfort and console him. Their names were Eliphaz the Temanite, Bildad the Shuhite, and Zophar the Naamathite. When they saw Job from a distance, they scarcely recognized him. Wailing loudly, they tore their robes and threw dust into the air over their heads to show their grief. Then they sat on the ground with him for seven days and nights. No one said a word to Job, for they saw that his suffering was too great for words.Until they opened their mouths, Job’s friends did exactly what they needed to do. They were present with their friend. We are always on dangerous ground when we assume the permission to explain other people’s experience, especially their sufferings, to them.Proverbs 17:17A friend is always loyal, and a brother is born to help in time of need.Proverbs 18:24There are “friends” who destroy each other, but a real friend sticks closer than a brother.We can be loyal friends ready to be of assistance when called upon. Friendship itself serves as a presence in someone’s life, even when we are not physically present with them.Romans 12:15Be happy with those who are happy, and weep with those who weep.1 Corinthians 9:22When I am with those who are weak, I share their weakness, for I want to bring the weak to Christ. Yes, I try to find common ground with everyone, doing everything I can to save some.2 Corinthians 1:3-4All praise to God, the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ. God is our merciful Father and the source of all comfort. He comforts us in all our troubles so that we can comfort others. When they are troubled, we will be able to give them the same comfort God has given us.We can sympathize and empathize with others, we can be concerned with their spiritual life, and we can share God’s comfort with them. Because God is with us and in us, we bring his presence into any situation we enter.Luke 1:42-44Elizabeth gave a glad cry and exclaimed to Mary, “God has blessed you above all women, and your child is blessed. Why am I so honored, that the mother of my Lord should visit me? When I heard your greeting, the baby in my womb jumped for joy.”John 2:1-2The next day there was a wedding celebration in the village of Cana in Galilee. Jesus’ mother was there, and Jesus and his disciples were also invited to the celebration.John 11:19Many of the people had come to console Martha and Mary in their loss.We can choose to participate in important life events with others. Our presence in both grief and celebrations can leave lasting impressions, opening doors for us to deeply influence and bless the lives of others.2 John 1:12I [John] have much more to say to you, but I don’t want to do it with paper and ink. For I hope to visit you soon and talk with you face to face. Then our joy will be complete.3 John 1:14I [John] hope to see you soon, and then we will talk face to face.We can choose to communicate with others. Face-to-face encounters are certainly a form of being present in someone’s life. But so is a phone call, a letter, an email, or any other sort of communication from a distance.Psalm 55:14What good fellowship we once enjoyed as we walked together to the house of God.Luke 2:5He [Joseph] took with him Mary, to whom he was engaged, who was now expecting a child.Romans 15:23-24Now I have finished my work in these regions, and after all these long years of waiting, I am eager to visit you. I am planning to go to Spain, and when I do, I will stop off in Rome. And after I have enjoyed your fellowship for a little while, you can provide for my journey.We can choose to have fellowship with one another. Heart to heart, mind to mind, person to person, we are in a position to resonate deeply with one another. This is more than merely being in the same place at the same time. It involves shared purposes, experiences, and a mutual desire to honor God.Matthew 18:20“Where two or three gather together as my followers, I am there among them.”We can join one another in prayer and other shared spiritual responsibilities, which may include confronting one another in love. Jesus promises his special presence when his followers are demonstrating their identity as such.Psalm 22:25I will praise you in the great assembly. I will fulfill my vows in the presence of those who worship you.Psalm 116:14I will keep my promises to the Lord in the presence of all his people.We can choose to provide accountability for one another. Keeping promises is easier with the help of a friend.

Question 3

How can we compensate for the times when we cannot be physically present?

Accepted Answer

Genesis 31:43-50Laban replied to Jacob, “These women are my daughters, these children are my grandchildren, and these flocks are my flocks—in fact, everything you see is mine. But what can I do now about my daughters and their children? So come, let’s make a covenant, you and I, and it will be a witness to our commitment.” So Jacob took a stone and set it up as a monument. Then he told his family members, “Gather some stones.” So they gathered stones and piled them in a heap. Then Jacob and Laban sat down beside the pile of stones to eat a covenant meal. . . . Then Laban declared, “This pile of stones will stand as a witness to remind us of the covenant we have made today. . . May the Lord keep watch between us to make sure that we keep this covenant when we are out of each other’s sight. If you mistreat my daughters or if you marry other wives, God will see it even if no one else does. He is a witness to this covenant between us.”1 Samuel 20:10-15Then David asked, “How will I know whether or not your father is angry?” “Come out to the field with me,” Jonathan replied. And they went out there together. Then Jonathan told David, “I promise by the Lord, the God of Israel, that by this time tomorrow, or the next day at the latest, I will talk to my father and let you know at once how he feels about you. If he speaks favorably about you, I will let you know. But if he is angry and wants you killed, may the Lord strike me and even kill me if I don’t warn you so you can escape and live. May the Lord be with you as he used to be with my father. And may you treat me with the faithful love of the Lord as long as I live. But if I die, treat my family with this faithful love, even when the Lord destroys all your enemies from the face of the earth.” So Jonathan made a solemn pact with David.1 Samuel 20:41-42As soon as the boy was gone, David came out from where he had been hiding near the stone pile. Then David bowed three times to Jonathan with his face to the ground. Both of them were in tears as they embraced each other and said good-bye, especially David. At last Jonathan said to David, “Go in peace, for we have sworn loyalty to each other in the Lord’s name. The Lord is the witness of a bond between us and our children forever.” Then David left, and Jonathan returned to the town.1 Samuel 23:18So the two of them [David and Jonathan] renewed their solemn pact before the Lord. Then Jonathan returned home, while David stayed at Horesh.We can be faithful to our relationships with one another. Though physically apart, two caring persons can remain faithful to their commitments to each other and provide emotional and spiritual support at a distance.1 Corinthians 5:3-4Even though I am not with you in person, I am with you in the Spirit. And as though I were there, I have already passed judgment on this man in the name of the Lord Jesus. You must call a meeting of the church. I will be present with you in spirit, and so will the power of our Lord Jesus.Philippians 1:7, 27So it is right that I should feel as I do about all of you, for you have a special place in my heart. You share with me the special favor of God, both in my imprisonment and in defending and confirming the truth of the Good News. . . . Above all, you must live as citizens of heaven, conducting yourselves in a manner worthy of the Good News about Christ. Then, whether I come and see you again or only hear about you, I will know that you are standing together with one spirit and one purpose, fighting together for the faith, which is the Good News.Philemon 1:12I am sending him back to you, and with him comes my own heart.We can choose to show concerned, committed, proactive love for others. True love and our demonstrations of it does not diminish with distance.3 John 1:15Peace be with you. Your friends here send you their greetings. Please give my personal greetings to each of our friends there.We can effectively communicate in ways other than face to face. The concerted effort to stay in touch is in fact a demonstration of love.2 Timothy 1:4I long to see you again, for I remember your tears as we parted. And I will be filled with joy when we are together again.We can longingly anticipate our reunion with others.

Question 4

How can the influence of significant people continue when they are no longer present?

Accepted Answer

Proverbs 20:7The godly walk with integrity; blessed are their children who follow them.Hebrews 12:1Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a huge crowd of witnesses to the life of faith, . . . let us run with endurance the race God has set before us.Hebrews 13:7Remember your leaders who taught you the word of God. Think of all the good that has come from their lives, and follow the example of their faith.2 Peter 1:14-15Our Lord Jesus Christ has shown me that I must soon leave this earthly life, so I will work hard to make sure you always remember these things after I am gone.Our shared experiences with others and the lessons they teach us leave lasting impressions on our lives. For believers, the memories often include the realization that those who have gone before have led us to faith and instructed us in following Jesus. If they have died, we can thank God for them; if they are still living, we can thank them, too.Proverbs 6:20-23My son, obey your father’s commands, and don’t neglect your mother’s instruction. Keep their words always in your heart. Tie them around your neck. . . .Reflecting on the past presence of others in your life (particularly parents) can reveal significant lasting effects. Wherever you travel, their counsel can lead you. You can sleep soundly and awake refreshed because your life is guided by their advice.Psalm 112:1-3Praise the Lord! How joyful are those who fear the Lord and delight in obeying his commands. Their children will be successful everywhere; an entire generation of godly people will be blessed. They themselves will be wealthy, and their good deeds will last forever.Your life, your words, and your actions have lasting effects on others. These transcend your time on earth. Future generations can be blessed because of the current presence of your integrity and faithfulness to God.