What should I do with my guilt?

Genesis 3:6-8The woman was convinced. She saw that the tree was beautiful and its fruit looked delicious, and she wanted the wisdom it would give her. So she took some of the fruit and ate it. Then she gave some to her husband, who was with her, and he ate it, too. At that moment their eyes were opened, and they suddenly felt shame at their nakedness. So they sewed fig leaves together to cover themselves. When the cool evening breezes were blowing, the man and his wife heard the Lord God walking about in the garden. So they hid from the Lord God among the trees.

Leviticus 5:5“When you become aware of your guilt in any of these ways, you must confess your sin.”

Proverbs 28:13People who conceal their sins will not prosper, but if they confess and turn from them, they will receive mercy.

Hebrews 4:12-13The word of God is alive and powerful. It is sharper than the sharpest two-edged sword, cutting between soul and spirit, between joint and marrow. It exposes our innermost thoughts and desires. Nothing in all creation is hidden from God. Everything is naked and exposed before his eyes, and he is the one to whom we are accountable.

Some of us stifle our guilt. Others of us fill our lives with distractions to help us temporarily forget our guilt. Like Adam and Eve, many of us try to hide our guilt from others—and even from God, as if it were possible to hide our guilt from an all-knowing God! The Bible commands us to face our guilt honestly and confess our faults to God and others. This is the first step toward learning from our mistakes, finding forgiveness, and moving forward.

Psalm 51:1-4Have mercy on me, O God, because of your unfailing love. Because of your great compassion, blot out the stain of my sins. Wash me clean from my guilt. Purify me from my sin. For I recognize my rebellion; it haunts me day and night. Against you, and you alone, have I sinned; I have done what is evil in your sight. You will be proved right in what you say, and your judgment against me is just.

All sin is first and foremost a sin against God. David wrote Psalm 51 as a prayer of repentance to God for his sins of adultery and murder. Read the full psalm to see how David expresses his guilt, true repentance, and hope in a restored relationship with God.

Matthew 5:23-24“So if you are presenting a sacrifice at the altar in the Temple and you suddenly remember that someone has something against you, leave your sacrifice there at the altar. Go and be reconciled to that person. Then come and offer your sacrifice to God.”

Matthew 5:46-48“If you love only those who love you, what reward is there for that? Even corrupt tax collectors do that much. If you are kind only to your friends, how are you different from anyone else? Even pagans do that. But you are to be perfect, even as your Father in heaven is perfect.”

Romans 12:17-18Never pay back evil with more evil. Do things in such a way that everyone can see you are honorable. Do all that you can to live in peace with everyone.

If you have sinned against someone else, apologize and repent. Even if it’s embarrassing. Even if that person also sinned against you. Even if you don’t like that person. Jesus puts such a high priority on apologizing that he encourages us to drop what we are doing and go make things right as soon as we realize we are at fault.

Acts 8:1Saul was one of the witnesses, and he agreed completely with the killing of Stephen.

Acts 9:1-4Meanwhile, Saul was uttering threats with every breath and was eager to kill the Lord’s followers. . . . He wanted to bring them—both men and women—back to Jerusalem in chains. As he was approaching Damascus on this mission, a light from heaven suddenly shone down around him. He fell to the ground and heard a voice saying to him, “Saul! Saul! Why are you persecuting me?”

Acts 9:26When Saul arrived in Jerusalem, he tried to meet with the believers, but they were all afraid of him. They did not believe he had truly become a believer!

Saul, more often known as the apostle Paul, used to imprison and murder Christians. Even after his miraculous conversion, the reality of what he had done had lasting consequences. Many believers had suffered because of his actions, and even believers who were willing to forgive him struggled to trust him. Be patient with anyone struggling to forgive you or trust you after what you have done. Patiently show the truth of your repentance with your actions.

Luke 19:1-10Jesus entered Jericho and made his way through the town. There was a man there named Zacchaeus. He was the chief tax collector in the region, and he had become very rich. He tried to get a look at Jesus, but he was too short to see over the crowd. So he ran ahead and climbed a sycamore-fig tree beside the road, for Jesus was going to pass that way. When Jesus came by, he looked up at Zacchaeus and called him by name. “Zacchaeus!” he said. “Quick, come down! I must be a guest in your home today.” Zacchaeus quickly climbed down and took Jesus to his house in great excitement and joy. But the people were displeased. “He has gone to be the guest of a notorious sinner,” they grumbled. Meanwhile, Zacchaeus stood before the Lord and said, “I will give half my wealth to the poor, Lord, and if I have cheated people on their taxes, I will give them back four times as much!” Jesus responded, “Salvation has come to this home today, for this man has shown himself to be a true son of Abraham. For the Son of Man came to seek and save those who are lost.”

Zacchaeus was one of the most hated sinners in his entire region. Not only had he betrayed his Jewish people to work for the oppressive Roman government, but he also oppressed the people by charging more than the government required (and keeping the extra money for himself). It wasn’t enough for Zacchaeus to merely say he was a different person, or even to stop cheating people. He needed to accept responsibility for his sins and do what he could to make things right. Zacchaeus sacrificed his enormous wealth to do exactly that. We, too, are called to offer restitution to those we have personally wronged.

Proverbs 29:25Fearing people is a dangerous trap, but trusting the Lord means safety.

Galatians 1:10Obviously, I’m not trying to win the approval of people, but of God. If pleasing people were my goal, I would not be Christ’s servant.

Some guilt is disproportionate, misguided, or unnecessary. We might feel guilty for forgetting to thank someone, or feel guilty for not being able to finish everything a coworker requested. While it’s good to set standards for ourselves and do our best, becoming more like Jesus does not mean becoming perfect in every way and making everyone happy. That is an unrealistic expectation. Such guilt becomes a burden and a distraction, weakening our ability to focus on what God is actually asking of us.

Acts 3:19“Now repent of your sins and turn to God, so that your sins may be wiped away.”

2 Corinthians 7:10The kind of sorrow God wants us to experience leads us away from sin and results in salvation. There’s no regret for that kind of sorrow. But worldly sorrow, which lacks repentance, results in spiritual death.

Guilt can prompt us to repent, but repentance is more than feeling guilty. While is good and healthy to feel remorse about our sin, if that sorrow leads us into depression and despair, that’s not the kind of sorrow God wants us to have. To repent means to turn away from one thing to another. It involves action! Pray to God for forgiveness. Ask for forgiveness from those you have sinned against. Do what you can to make things right and move forward. Instead of merely regretting the past, repentance sets its sights on a better future and takes steps to live it out.

Luke 22:56-62A servant girl noticed him in the firelight and began staring at him. Finally she said, “This man was one of Jesus’ followers!” But Peter denied it. “Woman,” he said, “I don’t even know him!” After a while someone else looked at him and said, “You must be one of them!” “No, man, I’m not!” Peter retorted. About an hour later someone else insisted, “This must be one of them, because he is a Galilean, too.” But Peter said, “Man, I don’t know what you are talking about.” And immediately, while he was still speaking, the rooster crowed. At that moment the Lord turned and looked at Peter. Suddenly, the Lord’s words flashed through Peter’s mind: “Before the rooster crows tomorrow morning, you will deny three times that you even know me.” And Peter left the courtyard, weeping bitterly.

Paul and Peter were the most influential apostles of the early church, yet both carried their share of sin and guilt. While Paul’s murderous past was before he became a believer, Peter’s sin of denying Jesus came after years of walking daily with him. Peter’s guilt shook him. It was hard for him to start again. But Jesus called him to do just that, using the very same words he first called Peter with: “Follow me” (see Matthew 4:18-19, John 21:22). Like Peter, we may question whether our guilt is so great that we have forfeited our right to follow Jesus. The truth is, none of us have a right to follow Jesus, but by God’s grace, we are called to follow him all the same. When your guilt feels too heavy to bear, remember Peter. God wasn’t finished with him, and he isn’t finished with you, either.

Philippians 3:12-14I [Paul] don’t mean to say that I have already achieved these things or that I have already reached perfection. But I press on to possess that perfection for which Christ Jesus first possessed me. No, dear brothers and sisters, I have not achieved it, but I focus on this one thing: Forgetting the past and looking forward to what lies ahead, I press on to reach the end of the race and receive the heavenly prize for which God, through Christ Jesus, is calling us.

Hebrews 12:1Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a huge crowd of witnesses to the life of faith, let us strip off every weight that slows us down, especially the sin that so easily trips us up. And let us run with endurance the race God has set before us. We do this by keeping our eyes on Jesus, the champion who initiates and perfects our faith

Guilt over genuine sin is a good thing. It encourages us to learn from our mistakes. It prompts us to change for the better. However, if we are dwelling on old sins and beating ourselves up over our guilt, that’s not what Scripture calls us to do. Paul encourages us to forget our past mistakes and focus on the joy ahead of us, Jesus! Our greatest motivator should be our desire to become more like him, and while we will stumble on that path, those missteps are far less significant than the destination.