Question 1

What is family? How does the Bible define it?

Accepted Answer

Genesis 2:24This explains why a man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.Ephesians 2:19So now you Gentiles are no longer strangers and foreigners. You are citizens along with all of God’s holy people. You are members of God’s family.James 1:18He chose to give birth to us by giving us his true word. And we, out of all creation, became his prized possession.The Bible talks about both an earthly family (made up of husband, wife, and children), and the family of God, which includes all who believe in Jesus Christ.Genesis 4:1Now Adam had sexual relations with his wife, Eve, and she became pregnant. When she gave birth to Cain, she said, “With the Lord’s help, I have produced a man!”God planned for husbands and wives to join him in the creation of families—the wonderful privilege of teaming up with the Creator to make children.1 Chronicles 9:1So all Israel was listed in the genealogical records in The Book of the Kings of Israel.The Bible lists several genealogies, all recorded by family units, showing the family as central and fundamental to the development of people and of nations.Proverbs 6:20-23My son, obey your father’s commands, and don’t neglect your mother’s instruction. Keep their words always in your heart. Tie them around your neck. When you walk, their counsel will lead you. When you sleep, they will protect you. When you wake up, they will advise you. For their command is a lamp and their instruction a light; their corrective discipline is the way to life.Nowhere can truth be more effectively taught and modeled than in the family.Joshua 24:15“Choose today whom you will serve. . . .But as for me and my family, we will serve the Lord.”The family is one of God’s greatest resources for affecting change in an individual as well as a community. This change is directly related to the family’s spiritual commitment and zeal.Psalm 127:3Children are a gift from the Lord; they are a reward from him.Children are a wonderful blessing.

Question 2

In what ways does God care about my family?

Accepted Answer

Psalm 127:1-5Unless the Lord builds a house, the work of the builders is wasted. Unless the Lord protects a city, guarding it with sentries will do no good. It is useless for you to work so hard from early morning until late at night, anxiously working for food to eat; for God gives rest to his loved ones. Children are a gift from the Lord; they are a reward from him. Children born to a young man are like arrows in a warrior’s hands. How joyful is the man whose quiver is full of them! He will not be put to shame when he confronts his accusers at the city gates.Family was God’s idea, so we know he cares deeply about our families and wants them each to be a source of blessing, security, and encouragement to us. Sadly, many families are instead filled with bickering, brokenness, and sin. This is not what God intended, and he offers another way. God won’t inflict his will on our families like a dictator, but when we recognize him as the leader of the family and embrace his principles of loving and caring, we are inviting him into the family, and his blessings will follow.Psalm 112:1-3How joyful are those who fear the Lord and delight in obeying his commands. Their children will be successful everywhere; an entire generation of godly people will be blessed. They themselves will be wealthy, and their good deeds will last forever.Proverbs 20:7The godly walk with integrity; blessed are their children who follow them.God blesses those who strive to be faithful. And typical of him, his blessings often overflow beyond the individual on to others. As we walk faithfully with God, his blessings will impact our children as well. These verses can be difficult for parents who faithfully follow God yet see their children go through dark times or wander astray. Ultimately, our children must find their own relationships with God. As parents, our responsibility is to remain faithful to God, pray he will get the attention of our children, and ask for God’s protection in the meantime. Our heavenly Father knows the ache of a parent’s heart when their children wander astray. He experiences that ache every day. But he, even more than earthly parents, rejoices in a wayward child’s return!Isaiah 59:21“And this is my covenant with them,” says the Lord. “My Spirit will not leave them, and neither will these words I have given you. They will be on your lips and on the lips of your children and your children’s children forever. I, the Lord, have spoken!”Acts 2:38-39Peter replied, “Each of you must repent of your sins and turn to God, and be baptized in the name of Jesus Christ for the forgiveness of your sins. Then you will receive the gift of the Holy Spirit. This promise is to you, to your children, and to those far away.”Too often we think in individualistic terms. But God cares about groups of people too, especially families. A group of people passionate about God can be a great source of light in the world. As you pray for the individuals in your family, also pray for your family as a whole, knowing that God wants to use them together to accomplish great things for him.

Question 3

What are my responsibilities to my family?

Accepted Answer

Deuteronomy 6:6-7“And you must commit yourselves wholeheartedly to these commands that I am giving you today. Repeat them again and again to your children. Talk about them when you are at home and when you are on the road, when you are going to bed and when you are getting up.”Proverbs 22:6Direct your children onto the right path, and when they are older, they will not leave it.Matthew 19:13-15One day some parents brought their children to Jesus so he could lay his hands on them and pray for them. But the disciples scolded the parents for bothering him. But Jesus said, “Let the children come to me. Don’t stop them! For the Kingdom of Heaven belongs to those who are like these children.” And he placed his hands on their heads and blessed them before he left.Ephesians 6:4Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger by the way you treat them. Rather, bring them up with the discipline and instruction that comes from the Lord.Parents have a responsibility to give their children spiritual training. Many parents feel unqualified for teaching God’s Word, so they count on Sunday school, youth group, and sermons to train their children. While all of these things are good, and our believing communities are essential to our walk with Christ, parents have a far greater influence on their children than the church. Even if a pastor or other teacher seems more qualified, your children aren’t living with and watching your pastor on a daily basis. When your children see you living out your faith—not just on Sunday—you will inspire them to build a relationship with God themselves.John 3:16“For this is how God loved the world: He gave his one and only Son, so that everyone who believes in him will not perish but have eternal life.”We should clearly explain to our children how they can receive salvation and eternal life through Jesus Christ.Exodus 10:2“I’ve also done it so you can tell your children and grandchildren about how I made a mockery of the Egyptians and about the signs I displayed among them—and so you will know that I am the Lord.”2 Timothy 1:5I remember your genuine faith, for you share the faith that first filled your grandmother Lois and your mother, Eunice. And I know that same faith continues strong in you.We should share spiritual experiences—stories of how God has worked in our lives—and remind our families of their spiritual heritage. As powerful as God’s work in Scripture is, there is something special about hearing someone’s firsthand experience of God’s goodness.Proverbs 31:27She carefully watches everything in her household and suffers nothing from laziness.1 Timothy 5:8Those who won’t care for their relatives, especially those in their own household, have denied the true faith. Such people are worse than unbelievers.We should watch over our children and work to provide and care for them. A couple with children has taken on a profound responsibility to take care of their physical, mental, social, and spiritual needs. Until our children are grown, their needs take precedence over our own.1 Samuel 3:13“I [the Lord] have warned him that judgment is coming upon his family forever, because his sons are blaspheming God and he hasn’t disciplined them.”1 Kings 1:6Now his father, King David, had never disciplined him at any time, even by asking, “Why are you doing that?” Adonijah had been born next after Absalom, and he was very handsome.Proverbs 3:11-12My child, don’t reject the Lord’s discipline, and don’t be upset when he corrects you. For the Lord corrects those he loves, just as a father corrects a child in whom he delights.Proverbs 29:15To discipline a child produces wisdom, but a mother is disgraced by an undisciplined child.Hebrews 12:10-11Our earthly fathers disciplined us for a few years, doing the best they knew how. But God’s discipline is always good for us, so that we might share in his holiness. No discipline is enjoyable while it is happening—it’s painful! But afterward there will be a peaceful harvest of right living for those who are trained in this way.We should discipline our children. Discipline is not enjoyable—either for the one receiving it or the one giving it. We can be tempted to avoid discipline because of the pain and even conflict that comes with it. Discipline, however, is a sign of love. Parents who discipline their children care more for their children’s well-being and character than they care about their children’s immediate approval. Over time, discipline confronts harmful habits and strengthens godly ones, leading to healthier, happier lives.Ephesians 6:4Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger by the way you treat them.We should remember that the responsibility to discipline is not a license to tyrannize our children. Parents are called to train and discipline but not to control. If children aren’t given freedom to make decisions—and even mistakes—then they may fail to develop the strength of character they need to make their faith their own.1 Peter 3:8Finally, all of you should be of one mind. Sympathize with each other. Love each other as brothers and sisters. Be tenderhearted, and keep a humble attitude.We should exemplify Christ’s love and extend mercy to one another. Just as God keeps loving and showing us mercy, even when we don’t deserve it, we are called to model that same care to our families, even when they don’t deserve it. Loving unconditionally, even when we are not shown love in return, is sometimes the only way to restore damaged relationships.1 Timothy 5:8Those who won’t care for their relatives, especially those in their own household, have denied the true faith. Such people are worse than unbelievers.We should care for our families. Caring for our families, including extended family, is a basic Christian responsibility.Ephesians 5:25-26For husbands, this means love your wives, just as Christ loved the church. He gave up his life for her to make her holy and clean, washed by the cleansing of God’s word.Ephesians 6:1-4Children, obey your parents because you belong to the Lord, for this is the right thing to do. “Honor your father and mother.” This is the first commandment with a promise: If you honor your father and mother, “things will go well for you, and you will have a long life on the earth.” Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger by the way you treat them. Rather, bring them up with the discipline and instruction that comes from the Lord.Titus 2:4-5These older women must train the younger women to love their husbands and their children, to live wisely and be pure, to work in their homes, to do good, and to be submissive to their husbands. Then they will not bring shame on the word of God.We should honor the members of our families. Honoring our family is one the pathways to receiving God’s promises. Husbands and wives are called to love and respect one another, putting each other’s needs above their own. Parents are entrusted to teach their children to walk in God’s ways and to discipline in love. Children are to respond with respect and obedience. When these happen, good things follow.

Question 4

What are some ways to bring family closer together?

Accepted Answer

Psalm 127:3Children are a gift from the Lord; they are a reward from him.We should let our children know that they are special gifts from God.Proverbs 22:6Direct your children onto the right path, and when they are older, they will not leave it.1 Thessalonians 5:16-18Always be joyful. Never stop praying. Be thankful in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you who belong to Christ Jesus.We should pray together, modeling our dependence on God.Deuteronomy 12:7“There you and your families will feast in the presence of the Lord your God, and you will rejoice in all you have accomplished because the Lord your God has blessed you.”Matthew 7:9-11“You parents—if your children ask for a loaf of bread, do you give them a stone instead? Or if they ask for a fish, do you give them a snake? Of course not! So if you sinful people know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your heavenly Father give good gifts to those who ask him.”Romans 12:15-16Be happy with those who are happy, and weep with those who weep. Live in harmony with each other. Don’t be too proud to enjoy the company of ordinary people. And don’t think you know it all!We should celebrate together. Family celebrations are an effective way to bond family members to each other and to God.

Question 5

Should I treat other believers like members of my own family?

Accepted Answer

1 Timothy 5:1-2Never speak harshly to an older man, but appeal to him respectfully as you would to your own father. Talk to younger men as you would to your own brothers. Treat older women as you would your mother, and treat younger women with all purity as you would your own sisters.1 Peter 3:8Finally, all of you should be of one mind. Sympathize with each other. Love each other as brothers and sisters. Be tenderhearted, and keep a humble attitude.God’s family should have all of the qualities of family life but extended throughout the family of God. We should love one another, sympathize with one another, and help one another. We should be bonded into a special family relationship.

Question 6

Why should leaders prioritize their families?

Accepted Answer

1 Samuel 2:12-25Now the sons of Eli were scoundrels who had no respect for the Lord or for their duties as priests. . . . Now Eli was very old, but he was aware of what his sons were doing to the people of Israel. . . . But Eli’s sons wouldn’t listen to their father.A leader’s family can cause great harm to the leader and to the larger community. A Christian leader whose own family doesn’t follow what he teaches loses the respect of his followers.1 Kings 1:6Now his father, King David, had never disciplined him at any time, even by asking, “Why are you doing that?”A leader’s failure to discipline his family can threaten his own legacy. David’s failure led his son, Adonijah, to try to establish himself as king in place of Solomon.1 Timothy 3:4-5He must manage his own family well, having children who respect and obey him. For if a man cannot manage his own household, how can he take care of God’s church?The way a leader leads his or her family reveals a great deal about their ability to lead others.Titus 1:6An elder must live a blameless life. He must be faithful to his wife, and his children must be believers who don’t have a reputation for being wild or rebellious.Leadership in all its aspects begins at home. Those who put their work first will find themselves last.