Question 1

Why should I be careful about criticizing others?

Accepted Answer

Romans 14:10So why do you condemn another believer? Why do you look down on another believer? Remember, we will all stand before the judgment seat of God.James 4:11Don’t speak evil against each other, dear brothers and sisters. If you criticize and judge each other, then you are criticizing and judging God’s law. But your job is to obey the law, not to judge whether it applies to you.Constructive criticism differs from condemnation and can be a welcome and wholesome gift if given in the spirit of love. But criticism that ridicules, demeans, or judges someone has at least four harmful consequences: (1) it tears down self-esteem, making a person feel shamed and worthless; (2) it damages your reputation, making you look mean and merciless; (3) it damages your ability to offer helpful advice because you’ve made someone become defensive; and (4) it brings greater judgment upon yourself from God, who detests when you hurt others.

Question 2

How do I offer criticism appropriately?

Accepted Answer

Matthew 7:5“Hypocrite! First get rid of the log in your own eye; then you will see well enough to deal with the speck in your friend’s eye.”John 8:7“Let the one who has never sinned throw the first stone!”Romans 2:1You may think you can condemn such people, but you are just as bad, and you have no excuse! When you say they are wicked and should be punished, you are condemning yourself, for you who judge others do these very same things.Before criticizing another, take an inventory of your own sins and shortcomings so that you can approach the person with understanding and humility.1 Corinthians 13:5[Love] does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged.Ephesians 4:29Don’t use foul or abusive language. Let everything you say be good and helpful, so that your words will be an encouragement to those who hear them.Constructive criticism is always offered in love, to build up. It addresses a specific need in someone else and is not a list of their shortcomings or character flaws. It is good, helpful, and encouraging, even while it is honest.

Question 3

How should I respond to criticism? How do I evaluate whether it is constructive or destructive?

Accepted Answer

Proverbs 12:16-18A wise person stays calm when insulted. An honest witness tells the truth; a false witness tells lies. Some people make cutting remarks, but the words of the wise bring healing.Ecclesiastes 7:5Better to be criticized by a wise person than to be praised by a fool.Stay calm and don’t lash back. Sometimes people criticize others in order to feel better about themselves. Measure criticism according to the character of the person who is giving it. Evaluate whether the criticism is coming from a person with a reputation for truth or lies. Ask yourself if the criticism is meant to heal or hurt.1 Corinthians 4:4My conscience is clear, but that doesn’t prove I’m right. It is the Lord himself who will examine me and decide.Always work to maintain a clear conscience by being honest and trustworthy. This allows you to shrug off criticism you know is unjustified.1 Peter 4:14If you are insulted because you bear the name of Christ, you will be blessed, for the glorious Spirit of God rests upon you.Consider it a privilege to be criticized for your faith in God. God has special blessings for those who patiently endure this kind of criticism.Proverbs 15:31-32If you listen to constructive criticism, you will be at home among the wise. . . . if you listen to correction, you grow in understanding.Don’t reject truthful information that will help you grow. This requires a great deal of humility because accepting criticism is a hard thing to do. Sometimes it’s painful to hear the truth, but it’s worse to continue harmful behavior.

Question 4

How should I respond to unjust criticism?

Accepted Answer

Proverbs 15:1A gentle answer deflects anger, but harsh words make tempers flare.When unjustly criticized, respond gently with the truth. Getting angry and defensive will only make the criticism seem true.John 19:9-11[Pilate] took Jesus back into the headquarters again and asked him, “Where are you from?” But Jesus gave no answer. “Why don’t you talk to me?” Pilate demanded. “Don’t you realize that I have the power to release you or crucify you?” Then Jesus said, “You would have no power over me at all unless it were given to you from above. So the one who handed me over to you has the greater sin.”1 Peter 2:23He [Jesus] did not retaliate when he was insulted, nor threaten revenge when he suffered. He left his case in the hands of God, who always judges fairly.Silence is often a good response. Intentional silence can express strength and communicate your desire to avoid the conflict. A second strategy is to simply state what you believe is the truth concerning your position.Galatians 1:10Obviously, I’m not trying to win the approval of people, but of God. If pleasing people were my goal, I would not be Christ’s servant.Human criticism loses much of its power when you focus on pleasing God more than others.

Question 5

How do I prevent unjust criticism against me?

Accepted Answer

Matthew 7:1“Do not judge others, and you will not be judged.”Romans 14:17-18The Kingdom of God is not a matter of what we eat or drink, but of living a life of goodness and peace and joy in the Holy Spirit. If you serve Christ with this attitude, you will please God, and others will approve of you, too.1 Peter 2:12Be careful to live properly among your unbelieving neighbors. Then even if they accuse you of doing wrong, they will see your honorable behavior, and they will give honor to God when he judges the world.You can often avoid being criticized by avoiding words and actions that warrant criticism. But you must recognize that some will criticize you simply because you follow God.

Question 6

How should leaders respond to criticism?

Accepted Answer

Proverbs 15:31If you listen to constructive criticism, you will be at home among the wise.Ecclesiastes 7:5Better to be criticized by a wise person than to be praised by a fool.Leaders are the most visible and therefore the most vulnerable to criticism. If you are a leader being criticized by a person whom you deem credible, humble yourself and consider that person’s input. Candid criticism can help you improve in countless ways.

Criticism