Question 1

When is aggression wrong?

Accepted Answer

Genesis 34:2, 7When the local prince, Shechem son of Hamor the Hivite, saw her, he took her and raped her . . . He arrived just as Jacob’s sons were coming in from the fields. They were shocked and furious that their sister had been raped. Shechem had done a disgraceful thing against Jacob’s family, a thing that should never have been done.2 Samuel 13:14Amnon wouldn’t listen to her, and since he was stronger than she was, he raped her.Proverbs 25:6Don’t demand an audience with the king or push for a place among the great.Romans 8:7The sinful nature is always hostile to God. It never did obey God’s laws, and it never will.James 1:20Human anger does not produce the righteousness God desires.James 3:14If you are bitterly jealous and there is selfish ambition in your heart, don’t cover up the truth with boasting and lying.The condition of the heart determines the nature of aggression. Aggression rooted in pride, jealousy, selfish ambition, or lust is sin and is destructive to others and ourselves.

Question 2

When is aggression right?

Accepted Answer

Psalm 71:8That is why I can never stop praising you; I declare your glory all day long.Psalm 89:33I will never stop loving him nor fail to keep my promise to him.Hosea 12:4Yes, he wrestled with the angel and won. He wept and pleaded for a blessing from him. There at Bethel he met God face to face, and God spoke to him.Hebrews 4:14So then, since we have a great High Priest who has entered heaven, Jesus the Son of God, let us hold firmly to what we believe.We are blessed when we aggressively pursue our relationship with God—seeking him, trusting him, loving him and praising him.Luke 9:23Then he said to the crowd, “If any of you wants to be my follower, you must give up your own way, take up your cross daily, and follow me.”Luke 14:33“So his master said, ‘Go out into the country lanes and behind the hedges and urge anyone you find to come, so that the house will be full.’”Romans 12:1And so, dear brothers and sisters, I plead with you to give your bodies to God because of all he has done for you. Let them be a living and holy sacrifice—the kind he will find acceptable. This is truly the way to worship him.1 Corinthians 9:24-27Don’t you realize that in a race everyone runs, but only one person gets the prize? So run to win! All athletes are disciplined in their training. They do it to win a prize that will fade away, but we do it for an eternal prize. So I run with purpose in every step. I am not just shadowboxing. I discipline my body like an athlete, training it to do what it should. Otherwise, I fear that after preaching to others I myself might be disqualified.Galatians 2:20My old self has been crucified with Christ. It is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me. So I live in this earthly body by trusting in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me.Hebrews 12:1-3Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a huge crowd of witnesses to the life of faith, let us strip off every weight that slows us down, especially the sin that so easily trips us up. And let us run with endurance the race God has set before us. We do this by keeping our eyes on Jesus, the champion who initiates and perfects our faith. Because of the joy awaiting him, he endured the cross, disregarding its shame. Now he is seated in the place of honor beside God’s throne. Think of all the hostility he endured from sinful people; then you won’t become weary and give up.We are to aggressively pursue Christ at all costs. He gave everything to us, and in love and loyalty, we can offer everything back to him. Becoming more like him requires great training, endurance, and sacrifice, but it is worth the eternal prize!Genesis 25:21Isaac pleaded with the Lord on behalf of his wife, because she was unable to have children. The Lord answered Isaac’s prayer, and Rebekah became pregnant with twins.2 Samuel 12:16David begged God to spare the child. He went without food and lay all night on the bare ground.Daniel 9:3“So I turned to the Lord God and pleaded with him in prayer and fasting. I also wore rough burlap and sprinkled myself with ashes.”Luke 11:9-10“And so I tell you, keep on asking, and you will receive what you ask for. Keep on seeking, and you will find. Keep on knocking, and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks, receives. Everyone who seeks, finds. And to everyone who knocks, the door will be opened.”2 Corinthians 12:8Three different times I begged the Lord to take it away.Ephesians 6:18Pray in the Spirit at all times and on every occasion. Stay alert and be persistent in your prayers for all believers everywhere.Hebrews 4:16So let us come boldly to the throne of our gracious God. There we will receive his mercy, and we will find grace to help us when we need it most.We are to aggressively pursue a life of prayer. God wants us to come to him with our requests and trust him for the answers that are best for us. If something is worth praying for, pray with persistence and passion.Mark 7:26She begged him to cast out the demon from her daughter.Mark 7:32A deaf man with a speech impediment was brought to him, and the people begged Jesus to lay his hands on the man to heal him.Mark 8:22When they arrived at Bethsaida, some people brought a blind man to Jesus, and they begged him to touch the man and heal him.Luke 4:38After leaving the synagogue that day, Jesus went to Simon’s home, where he found Simon’s mother-in-law very sick with a high fever. “Please heal her,” everyone begged.Luke 5:18Some men came carrying a paralyzed man on a sleeping mat. They tried to take him inside to Jesus.Luke 7:4So they earnestly begged Jesus to help the man.2 Corinthians 10:4-5We use God’s mighty weapons, not worldly weapons, to knock down the strongholds of human reasoning and to destroy false arguments. We destroy every proud obstacle that keeps people from knowing God. We capture their rebellious thoughts and teach them to obey Christ.We are to aggressively bring others to Jesus (not argumentative or nagging, but patient, prayerful, persistent, and bold—in love). Helping someone know Jesus and have their life changed for eternity will be worth all our efforts.John 4:47When he heard that Jesus had come from Judea to Galilee, he went and begged Jesus to come to Capernaum to heal his son, who was about to die.We are to aggressively seek Jesus’ help with our problems.1 Thessalonians 2:12We pleaded with you, encouraged you, and urged you to live your lives in a way that God would consider worthy. For he called you to share in his Kingdom and glory.1 Timothy 1:18Timothy, my son, here are my instructions for you, based on the prophetic words spoken about you earlier. May they help you fight well in the Lord’s battles.1 Timothy 4:11Teach these things and insist that everyone learn them.1 Timothy 5:21I solemnly command you in the presence of God and Christ Jesus and the highest angels to obey these instructions without taking sides or showing favoritism to anyone.Titus 3:8This is a trustworthy saying, and I want you to insist on these teachings so that all who trust in God will devote themselves to doing good. These teachings are good and beneficial for everyone.We are to aggressively encourage one another to grow in our personal relationship with God. Encouraging others to walk more closely with God will have a profound and life-changing impact on them forever.Proverbs 22:24-25Don’t befriend angry people or associate with hot-tempered people, or you will learn to be like them and endanger your soul.Matthew 5:29-30“So if your eye—even your good eye—causes you to lust, gouge it out and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to be thrown into hell. And if your hand—even your stronger hand—causes you to sin, cut it off and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to be thrown into hell.”1 Corinthians 5:9When I wrote to you before, I told you not to associate with people who indulge in sexual sin.1 Corinthians 6:18Run from sexual sin! No other sin so clearly affects the body as this one does. For sexual immorality is a sin against your own body.1 Corinthians 15:33Don’t be fooled by those who say such things, for “bad company corrupts good character.”Ephesians 5:11Take no part in the worthless deeds of evil and darkness; instead, expose them.Colossians 3:5So put to death the sinful, earthly things lurking within you. Have nothing to do with sexual immorality, impurity, lust, and evil desires. Don’t be greedy, for a greedy person is an idolater, worshiping the things of this world.James 4:7So humble yourselves before God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.We are to aggressively resist sin’s temptations, separating ourselves from thoughts, behaviors, situations, and sometimes even people that lead us into sin.

Question 3

How should I deal with those who use aggression against me?

Accepted Answer

Exodus 17:4Then Moses cried out to the Lord, “What should I do with these people? They are ready to stone me!”Psalm 22:12My enemies surround me like a herd of bulls; fierce bulls of Bashan have hemmed me in!Psalm 27:12Do not let me fall into their hands. For they accuse me of things I’ve never done; with every breath they threaten me with violence.Psalm 35:17How long, O Lord, will you look on and do nothing? Rescue me from their fierce attacks. Protect my life from these lions!Psalm 36:11Don’t let the proud trample me or the wicked push me around.Psalm 57:4I am surrounded by fierce lions who greedily devour human prey—whose teeth pierce like spears and arrows, and whose tongues cut like swords.Psalm 59:3They have set an ambush for me. Fierce enemies are out there waiting, Lord, though I have not sinned or offended them.We are to come to God honestly, seeking his protection, advice, comfort, and wisdom. The first thing we can do in dealing with aggressive people is to ask God to deal with them his way. In relationships, countering aggression with aggression usually escalates our problems.Leviticus 19:18“Do not seek revenge or bear a grudge against a fellow Israelite, but love your neighbor as yourself. I am the Lord.”1 Samuel 26:8“God has surely handed your enemy over to you this time!” Abishai whispered to David. “Let me pin him to the ground with one thrust of the spear; I won’t need to strike twice!”Romans 12:19Dear friends, never take revenge. Leave that to the righteous anger of God. For the Scriptures say, “I will take revenge; I will pay them back,” says the Lord.Hebrews 10:30We know the one who said, “I will take revenge. I will pay them back.” He also said, “The Lord will judge his own people.”We are to leave all vengeance to God who alone is fully just. He sees when we are wronged, and will make sure justice ultimately prevails.Proverbs 22:24-25Don’t befriend angry people or associate with hot-tempered people, or you will learn to be like them and endanger your soul.1 Samuel 19:1-3Saul now urged his servants and his son Jonathan to assassinate David. But Jonathan, because of his strong affection for David, told him what his father was planning. “Tomorrow morning,” he warned him, “you must find a hiding place out in the fields. I’ll ask my father to go out there with me, and I’ll talk to him about you. Then I’ll tell you everything I can find out.”1 Timothy 5:22Do not share in the sins of others. Keep yourself pure.We are to have no part in others’ inappropriate aggressive behavior. God may even call us to help the aggressor’s intended victim.Genesis 39:12She came and grabbed him by his cloak, demanding, “Come on, sleep with me!” Joseph tore himself away, but he left his cloak in her hand as he ran from the house.John 6:15When Jesus saw that they were ready to force him to be their king, he slipped away into the hills by himself.When others exhibit aggressive behavior, sometimes the best solution is to leave. Running away from evil, temptation, or harm is often not cowardly, but wise.Isaiah 1:17Learn to do good. Seek justice. Help the oppressed. Defend the cause of orphans. Fight for the rights of widows.Matthew 5:41-44“If a soldier demands that you carry his gear for a mile, carry it two miles. Give to those who ask, and don’t turn away from those who want to borrow. You have heard the law that says, ‘Love your neighbor’ and hate your enemy. But I say, love your enemies! Pray for those who persecute you!”Matthew 21:12-13Jesus entered the Temple and began to drive out all the people buying and selling animals for sacrifice. He knocked over the tables of the money changers and the chairs of those selling doves. He said to them, “The Scriptures declare, ‘My Temple will be called a house of prayer,’ but you have turned it into a den of thieves!”Luke 4:29-30Jumping up, they mobbed him [Jesus] and forced him to the edge of the hill on which the town was built. They intended to push him over the cliff, but he passed right through the crowd and went on his way.Luke 6:29“If someone slaps you on one cheek, offer the other cheek also. If someone demands your coat, offer your shirt also.”Acts 9:3-5As he was approaching Damascus on this mission, a light from heaven suddenly shone down around him. He fell to the ground and heard a voice saying to him, “Saul! Saul! Why are you persecuting me?” “Who are you, lord?” Saul asked. And the voice replied, “I am Jesus, the one you are persecuting!”Romans 5:8, 10-11God showed his great love for us by sending Christ to die for us while we were still sinners. . . . For since our friendship with God was restored by the death of his Son while we were still his enemies, we will certainly be saved through the life of his Son. So now we can rejoice in our wonderful new relationship with God because our Lord Jesus Christ has made us friends of God.2 Corinthians 10:1Now I, Paul, appeal to you with the gentleness and kindness of Christ—though I realize you think I am timid in person and bold only when I write from far away.Jesus not only preached turning the other cheek—he did so himself. Though he could have called down instant judgment on those who opposed him, mocked him, or tried to kill him, he did not respond with aggression. Jesus, however, did not stand by while others were being oppressed. He confronted the religious leaders’ pride, hypocrisy, and lack of love for the poor and hurting. But Jesus did not justify rejecting and hating a person or group of people because of their aggressive behavior. Paul, a Pharisee, was chosen to become the greatest evangelist of all time. And all Christians—including us—were sinners living in rebellion to God before Christ chose to die for us. Ultimately, Jesus responded to human aggression with perfect love—both a love for the victims and a love for the aggressor. We are called to do the same.

Question 4

How can I avoid being aggressive towards others?

Accepted Answer

Proverbs 15:1A gentle answer deflects anger, but harsh words make tempers flare.Proverbs 17:27A truly wise person uses few words; a person with understanding is even-tempered.Proverbs 25:6-7Don’t demand an audience with the king or push for a place among the great. It’s better to wait for an invitation to the head table than to be sent away in public disgrace.Proverbs 25:15Patience can persuade a prince, and soft speech can break bones.1 Corinthians 13:5[Love] does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged.1 Thessalonians 2:7-8As apostles of Christ we certainly had a right to make some demands of you, but instead we were like children among you. Or we were like a mother feeding and caring for her own children. We loved you so much that we shared with you not only God’s Good News but our own lives, too.2 Timothy 4:2Preach the word of God. Be prepared, whether the time is favorable or not. Patiently correct, rebuke, and encourage your people with good teaching.Philemon 1:14I didn’t want to do anything without your consent. I wanted you to help because you were willing, not because you were forced.We are to be loving, considerate, gentle and patient in what we say and what we do. Love reaches out when we want to withhold. Love withholds when we want to strike out. Thus, love is both a motivating and a restraining force.Acts 21:14When it was clear that we couldn’t persuade him, we gave up and said, “The Lord’s will be done.”Sometimes, the decisions of others are beyond our responsibility and control. Even when we feel we are right, we need wisdom to know when to stop and say, “The will of the Lord be done.”