Flattery Will Get You Nowhere

Whoever flatters his neighboris spreading a net for his feet.

Proverbs 29:5 (NIV)

We all like receiving a compliment, don’t we? A word of encouragement is just that. It encourages us. But flattery as defined by Webster’s is “an insincere compliment, excessive or unjustified praise.” Put another way, flattery’s not truthful, and in the end, it isn’t kind.

So let’s beware of people who lavish flattery and praise. Women, young and old, beware of a man who gives you too much of the wrong kind of attention. Beware. There may be a hidden agenda at work. An old folk saying is “Flattery looks like friendship, just like a wolf looks like a dog.”

Pastor Chuck Smith comments that “flattery is often used to soften us up and then trip us up.” If we listen to enough flattery, we might begin to believe it, causing us to think too much of ourselves.

It’s been said, “Flattery is like perfume. You can sniff it. Just don’t drink it.”

But on the other hand, many people never hear a word of praise, not ever. So if you’re a Sunday school teacher, try to find one uplifting thing to say to each child before they leave class. If you’re a mom, don’t just point out your kids’ mistakes, catch them being good. Praise them. And wives, when your husband comes home, bless him with a kind, encouraging word. It might be the only one he’s heard all day.

Make It Personal . . . Live It Out!

Flattery not only puffs people up, it sets them up. Parents and grandparents often praise a child’s accomplishments. We cheer the winning team or the good grades. Everyone loves a winner. But when your child strikes out or struggles with math, they may interpret your lack of praise as a statement of failure. Achievements come and go. Praise your kids when they do their best, regardless of results. Teach them to be kind to their teammate who dropped the ball; it’s only a game. Show them you’re their best fan—not because of what they do, but because of who they are.

One Year Bible Reading

Hosea 1:1–3:5; 1 John 5:1-21; Psalm 124:1-8; Proverbs 29:5-8