The Friends Who Matter

The Friends Who Matter

So Jonathan made a solemn pact with David, saying, “May the LORD destroy all your enemies!” And Jonathan made David reaffirm his vow of friendship again, for Jonathan loved David as he loved himself. 1 Samuel 20:16-17

In the work that I do, I’ve had plenty of opportunities to rub shoulders with people of high status. I could easily have chosen to be friends only with those considered by society to be “important.” But that’s not how I choose my friends. I look for people of character whose company I enjoy. Some of those people are famous and influential, others are not. I appreciate the people in my life for the ways they live according to their character and values and in the process, shape and reinforce mine.

My parents always discouraged us from hanging around people who didn’t share our values. We knew to be friendly to everyone but not to become friends with everyone. Instead, we were encouraged to hang out with people whose inner cores would build us up. And I still look for that today.

That’s why I always enjoyed attending the coaches’ camps put on each year by the Fellowship of Christian Athletes. No one cares about status at those camps. NFL coaches interact with high school assistant coaches. Division I college coaches aren’t distinguished from small-school coaches. You wouldn’t be able to tell who’s who simply by listening to their conversations because they are all just guys who enjoy football, helping young men, and living for Christ. Their achievements and their status take a backseat to the more important things.

The short week spent together at these camps gives me much-needed encouragement. I share the same values with the friends I’ve met there, and they build me up. Just being with them reminds me of the important things in life and reinforces the values I’ve chosen to have.

When you choose your friends based on their values and not their status, being with them will recharge your batteries and help keep you grounded in a world in which status is much too highly valued.

Uncommon Key > Choose your friends because you enjoy their company, not because their company makes you look better. Spending time with those who share your values creates an environment for solid friendships to grow.