Not Buying The Hollywood Version Of Love

Not Buying the Hollywood Version of Love

Because there is so much sexual immorality, each man should have his own wife, and each woman should have her own husband. 1 Corinthians 7:2

In most television romantic comedies and dramas today, an unmarried couple sleeping together is a natural step in the growth of the relationship. The story lines create a strong emotional connection between the viewers and the characters, so we’re happy for the lovers when they finally get physically intimate. In most cases the addition of sex to the relationship is depicted as a step forward. It doesn’t create more anxiety and complications for the characters; it’s normal, expected, and problem free.

I think this portrayal does us a disservice. That’s not how it works in real life. Sex is powerful, and the depth of such intimacy can have a negative impact on a relationship if it happens too soon and before a permanent commitment. A relationship that might otherwise grow from a friendship into a romance and then into a marriage is often derailed when a couple rearranges the order of things. Sex before marriage moves an act of commitment into the earliest stages of the relationship, long before a commitment is appropriate. The result is a very distorted and idealized picture of how relationships work.

The goal of dating should be friendship first. Then, when you’ve found your soul mate, comes marriage and then sex. But this progression is often sabotaged for a few moments of pleasure. And unlike in television shows or the movies, there are often long-term consequences that come with this short-term pleasure in real life. The pressure added to the relationship can result in unwise commitments. I agree with George Bernard Shaw: “Not only are our adolescents not taught the physiology of sex, but [they are] never warned that the strongest sexual attraction may exist between persons so incompatible in tastes and capacities that they could not endure living together for a week much less a lifetime.” Sex does not cure anything in a relationship or take things to the next level. It more often adds complications and masks other problems.

If you are unmarried, learn to delay gratification. If you are a parent, teach your kids the importance of waiting. God teaches you to remain sexually pure for your own benefit—so you’ll experience the best and most fulfilling sex life possible. Sexual purity requires daily diligence in your thoughts and actions, and it isn’t easy. But it is definitely worth it.

Uncommon Key > The art of delayed gratification, especially in the area of sexual purity, is well worth learning. Make changes in this area in your life if you need to.