An End To Quarrels

What is causing the quarrels and fights among you? Don’t they come from the evil desires at war within you? . . . When you ask, you don’t get it because your motives are all wrong—you want only what will give you pleasure.

James 4:1, 3

Few things can distract us from the Lord’s voice like being at odds with those around us. In today’s verses, James pinpoints the reason behind quarreling and contention. He isolates evil desires at war within a person as the crux of the problem. The word translated “evil desires” simply means strong, intense desires. The word is neutral as to good or bad. In this case, those desires have become misdirected. They probably started out as legitimate desires, but we try to get them met outside of God’s provision, so they get warped, and instead of drawing us toward God, they put a wedge between us and others.

For example, our desire for love and acceptance is built in by the Creator and is meant to be his entry point into our lives. When we turn that desire outward and expect others to love us as we want to be loved, it backfires. No one can fill that role. That sloshes over into the desire for possessions and position as we try to feel loved and valued.

James says we should turn that desire to God to find fulfillment of our longings. Otherwise that same desire will put us into conflict with those around us.

He concludes by saying that when we do ask God for something, we tend want to spend it on our own desires. It’s not that God never wants our desires to be fulfilled, but in this situation he withholds fulfillment because we are trying to acquire something that will fill the space in our hearts reserved for him. Getting what we asked for in this case would diminish us instead of enhancing us.

God promises not only to protect us from our misdirected desires but also to give us all good things.

Father, I trust your decisions about how you want to fulfill the needs and desires in my life.

Nothing is won by force. I choose to be gentle. If I raise my voice may it be only in praise. If I clench my fist, may it be only in prayer. If I make a demand, may it be only of myself.

Max Lucado(1955–), American pastor and author