The Hindrance Of Ruptured Relationships

The Hindrance of Ruptured Relationships

Treat her as you should so your prayers will not be hindered. 1 Peter 3:7

WE LIKE TO THINK OUR RELATIONSHIP WITH GOD is just between us—that if we’re good with him, nothing else matters. But according to God’s own Word, loving him involves loving others; fellowship with him implies fellowship with others; and being forgiven in a relationship of grace means forgiving others in a culture of grace. That’s a major theme in John’s first letter and Jesus’ teachings. Our vertical relationship with our Father has quite a lot to do with our horizontal relationships with fellow human beings. And if those are out of sorts, something is wrong.

Conflicts and ruptures in human relationships can hinder our prayers. Jesus put forgiveness at the center of our relationship with God and other people, binding the horizontal and vertical into one coherent package (Matthew 5:23-24; 6:14-15; 18:21-35). If we aren’t right with our brother or sister, we aren’t entirely right with God. Redeemed and clean? Yes. Ready to proceed in a relationship of intimacy and grace? Not yet.

That has profound implications for our prayers. It isn’t that God never answers the prayers of those who have conflict in their lives. Jesus experienced conflict all the time, and God clearly answered his prayers. But we need to pay attention to our role in conflicted relationships. If we can do something to resolve them, we should.

That is nowhere more important than in marriage. The relationship that best portrays the intimacy between Jesus and his beloved (Ephesians 5:25-33) is our highest priority for unity. It’s true that friction is inevitable, and it’s also true that one partner can be zealous about the spiritual implications of the relationship while the other ignores them. But neglect of this relationship implies a neglect of the nearest picture of Jesus and his bride. The ideal illustration of prayer and provision is undermined by a distorted portrayal of it. This has to change. When it does—or at least when we seek restoration—prayer is empowered and free, and God responds in love.

To live in prayer together is to walk in love together.