Revenge Is Costly - Joab

When Abner arrived back at Hebron, Joab took him aside at the gateway as if to speak with him privately. But then he stabbed Abner in the stomach and killed him in revenge for killing his brother Asahel.

2 Samuel 3:27

“Revenge is a dish best served cold,” said Khan, an old enemy of the fictional Admiral James T. Kirk. Khan wanted to avenge a perceived wrong done to him in the 1982 movie Star Trek: The Wrath of Khan.

Revenge can cost both parties dearly. As an example, look at the life of Joab, the nephew and army commander of King David. Joab had served the king faithfully and had enjoyed success in his military career, rising to the office of top general. He failed because he used his high position to settle old scores—namely, the death of his brother Asahel at the hand of Abner, the uncle of Saul, the former king of Israel (see 2 Samuel 2:18-32).

At an opportune time, Joab lured Abner—once an enemy of David but now ready to make peace—to the gate of Hebron and murdered him, thus avenging his brother’s death while eliminating a potential rival.

Joab had his revenge, but it came at a steep price. When word reached David about what had happened, the king praised Abner but cursed Joab and his family (see 2 Samuel 3:28-29).

Although Joab continued to serve David, when he indulged in vengeance instead of using his position appropriately, he lost an important part of himself. He also planted the seeds of his own eventual destruction (see 1 Kings 2:5-6, 28-35).

Every act of vengeance you ponder and every plan you make for getting even costs you part of who God made you to be. When someone does you wrong, even intentionally, make it your business to forgive that person and to move on so that you can continue to pursue the good things that God has placed before you.