The Gift Of Trust

The Gift of Trust

The LORD is good, a strong refuge when trouble comes. He is close to those who trust in him.

Nahum 1:7

in the 2010 Vancouver Olympics the Netherlands’ superstar skater Sven Kramer learned a heart-wrenching lesson in trust. In the Olympic finals for the 10,000-meter race, he skated the 25 times around the rink so well that he set an Olympic record. He finished a full 4 seconds ahead of the second-place skater. He was thrilled. The week before he had won gold in the 5,000 meter race. Now he had won a second Olympic gold medal, and done that representing a country that adores speed skating. He was a national hero!

But some of that glory quickly evaporated. Moments after Kramer crossed the finish line, his coach, a former Olympian himself, approached him and broke the unthinkable news. Kramer had been disqualified from the race. With eight laps to go, he had changed lanes improperly. What made this disqualification so bitter for Kramer was that he had changed lanes for only one reason: his coach had told him to change lanes. In other words, he had no plans to change lanes until his coach called out for him to change.

In a situation when a split-second decision had to be made, Kramer trusted his coach, and it cost him an Olympic gold medal. Kramer, of course, was not the only one to suffer an emotional blow. The coach later said it was “the worst moment in my career.” He said, “Sven was right. I was wrong.” No doubt he will reflect on what happened for the rest of his life.

What do you do when you fail someone else’s trust? What do you do when someone fails your trust and costs you plenty? What happens to trust in a relationship after a costly failure?

The next day Sven Kramer told the media that he had forgiven his coach, and they would continue working together. Kramer said, “The past few years have been too good. We have won so much together. You can’t just throw that away.”^a

Every couple can learn from Kramer’s forgiveness. After all, trust begins to crumble in a marriage most often when little promises are broken. When little deceptions are discovered. And the tragedy of most seemingly insignificant experiences of deception is that they mushroom and ultimately create a cloud of distrust that hovers over a relationship. That’s why the author of Nahum reminds us that God cares for those who trust in him.

Trust is built on integrity. Without it, Scripture says, we will be despised and destroyed (see Psalm 5:6). Integrity means telling the truth, keeping our promises, doing what we said we would do, choosing to be accountable, and taking as our motto, semper fidelis—the promise to be always faithful.

The gift of trust is rare. But doesn’t your marriage deserve it?

To be trusted is a greater compliment than to be loved.

—George Macdonald

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