How’s Your Love Life?

Since they are no longer two but one, let no one split apart what God has joined together.

Matthew 19:6

That’s a fair question, isn’t it? After all, sexuality is not a given, something that somehow miraculously takes care of itself once we enter marriage. It needs nurture, tenderness, education, and—are you ready for this?—religion.

It’s a fact. Religion, according to some studies, is good for your sex life. As strange as it may sound, there is a strong link in marriage between spirituality and sexuality. Married couples who cultivate spiritual intimacy are far more likely to report higher satisfaction with their love lives than other couples.

This fact makes sense if you think about it. The mysteries, wonders, and pleasures of sex in marriage are a divine gift to celebrate. Those who try to limit sex to procreation are simply ignoring the Bible. Scripture—right from the beginning—enthusiastically affirms sex within the bonds of marriage.

Start with the first chapter of the Bible. It contains a magnificent comment on the meaning of sexuality in marriage. As God is bringing the universe into existence, we are told that the human creation is set apart from all others, for it is the Imago Dei, the image of God: “God created human beings in his own image. In the image of God he created them; male and female he created them” (Genesis 1:27). Our maleness and femaleness is not just an accidental arrangement of the human species. Our male and female sexuality is related to our creation in the image of God. This point is echoed throughout Scripture. And Jesus certainly underscores a high view of sex in marriage when he refers to the Genesis passage and then adds, “Since they are no longer two but one, let no one split apart what God has joined together” (Matthew 19:6).

In the Old Testament and in the New Testament, in the Gospels and in the Epistles, we find the call to celebrate sexuality in marriage. There is no denying that your spiritual growth helps to enhance your sexual intimacy in marriage. So, we’ll ask it again. How’s your love life?

What a happy and holy fashion it is that those who love one another should rest on the same pillow.

—Nathaniel Hawthorne

From the book