Couples That Pray Together

Pray in the Spirit at all times and on every occasion. Stay alert and be persistent in your prayers for all believers everywhere.

Ephesians 6:18

“I feel closer to you when we pray together,” Leslie recently told me. “It’s probably the most intimate thing we do.” And she’s right. It’s part of God’s desiring that we walk together with him—not in a formal or legalistic way, but in a way that is genuine and natural. God longs to be part of each and every marriage, and prayer is one of the best ways we know of for inviting him into yours.

But let’s get real. Spiritual intimacy, while vital to a healthy marriage, so often seems elusive. We are the first to admit that we don’t pray together as often as we’d like. We’re not the types to kneel beside the bed each night or morning and hold hands while we call on God together. We’d probably be better for it, but more often than not our prayers together (other than at meal times) are spontaneous and often unexpected. But with the nightly ritual of tucking our little boys in bed, we’ve discovered how meaningful it is to say a prayer together before falling asleep.

Maybe you already do this. If so, you know the harmony it brings to your marriage. As Swiss physician Paul Tournier pointed out, praying together enriches a couple’s home.^a Heartfelt prayer together lowers our defenses and heightens our teamwork. It joins our sprits together—even when our differing temperaments, ideas, and tastes threaten to divide us. And by the way, for all those skeptics who think that prayer is for uptight people who can barely mention the word sex, researchers have found something surprising: Couples that pray together have better sex lives. Why? Well, when two people’s bodies, souls, and spirits are in harmony with one another and with their Creator, physical intimacy becomes reminiscent of Paradise, and love returns to Eden.

So say your prayers tonight, and every night you can. It just may be the most important thing you do all day.

To be a Christian without prayer is no more possible than to be alive without breathing.

—Martin Luther king Jr.

^a 143

From the book