The Gift Of Anger

The Gift of Anger

God is my shield, saving those whose hearts are true and right. God is an honest judge. He is angry with the wicked every day.

Psalm 7:10-11

ANGER IS OFTEN SEEN as an enemy to a good marriage, but I believe God intended it to be a friend. Anger is a gift from God. It reflects our concern for right and our love for people.

The passage above from Psalm 7 shows that the Lord is angry toward those who do wrong. Why? The psalm goes on to talk about these people setting traps for others and intending violence. Their capacity for harming others is large, and that disregard for others makes the Lord angry.

In the same way, if our spouse is committing a wrong, we may become angry because we know it will hurt people—including our spouse. In the example from Psalms, God’s anger and resulting actions may lead the wrongdoers to repentance. Our anger, likewise, should motivate us to influence our spouse to stop the wrong behavior and do what is right.

In God’s plan, anger serves a good end. However, as with all of God’s gifts, Satan seeks to pervert God’s plan. Often, he is successful. When we succumb to Satan, our anger makes the situation worse rather than better. Perhaps we respond in judgment rather than with concern, or we’re self-righteous or cutting in the way we express ourselves.

The best thing we can do when we are angry is to pray. We need to ask God to show us how we can have a positive influence on our spouse. Remember, the purpose of our anger is to motivate us to cooperate with God in helping our spouse turn away from sinful behavior.

Father, when I am angry with my spouse, please help me to figure out the reasons why. When my anger is justified because my spouse is doing something wrong or harmful, give me wisdom about how to respond. I know my focus needs to be on encouraging my spouse back to the right path.

Anger