Embracing Differences

Embracing Differences

The body is a unit, though it is made up of many parts; and though all its parts are many, they form one body. So it is with Christ.

1 Corinthians 12:12 (NIV)

WHAT ARE SOME of the differences between you and your spouse? If you are an optimist, your spouse may be a pessimist. Often, one spouse is quiet; the other is talkative. One tends to be organized with everything in its place; the other spends half a lifetime looking for car keys.

After years of arguing about differences, couples often conclude that they are incompatible. In fact, incompatibility—or “irreconcilable differences”—is often cited as the grounds for divorce. However, after thirty years of counseling married couples, I’m convinced that there are no irreconcilable differences, only people who refuse to reconcile.

In God’s mind, our differences are designed to be complementary, not to cause conflicts. The principle is illustrated by the church, as the apostle Paul described in 1 Corinthians 12. Each member performs a different role, yet each is seen as an important part of the body. Believers can accomplish far more when we function as a team. Why can’t we get this working in our marriages? It all begins by accepting our differences as an asset rather than a liability. Why not begin by thanking God that you and your spouse aren’t exactly alike?

Lord Jesus, thank you for the reminder that your church is stronger because it is made up of many people with different gifts and skills. When I get frustrated with how different my spouse and I are, help me to remember that those differences can make us a better team. Please show us how to celebrate each other’s uniqueness.

Differences