Change Through Affirmation

Change through Affirmation

Encourage one another daily, as long as it is called Today, so that none of you may be hardened by sin’s deceitfulness.

Hebrews 3:13 (NIV)

WHAT WOULD LIFE BE LIKE if your spouse gave you encouraging words every day? “Like heaven,” one husband said. One woman responded, “I’d think my husband was drunk.” How tragic that we typically give each other so few words of affirmation. We allow the emotions of hurt, disappointment, and anger to keep us from speaking positive words to each other, or maybe we simply get stuck in a pattern of negative comments. As a result, distance and dissatisfaction grow.

All of us long to hear affirming words, and those whose primary love language is affirming words long for them even more. We like to sense that our efforts are appreciated, and that our spouse sees something good in us. When we are affirmed, we aspire to be better. When we are ignored or condemned, we either become discouraged and withdraw, or become angry and hostile. Positive words can change the emotional atmosphere in a marriage. We need to look for something good in our spouse and affirm it.

The apostle Paul challenged his readers to “encourage each another and build each other up” (1 Thessalonians 5:11). The author of Hebrews suggested that believers give each other daily encouragement as a safeguard against hardened hearts and sin. Encouragement is important. Our words are like medication to a sick relationship. There is healing, and it often begins with words of affirmation.

Father, I don’t want my spouse’s heart to be hardened by my negativity. Please help me to encourage through my loving, encouraging words. I see so much in my loved one that is good, and I need to say so. Thank you for affirming me through the loving words I read in the Bible.

Affirmation