Big God

Big God

When I look at the night sky and see the work of your fingers—the moon and the stars you set in place—what are mere mortals that you should think about them, human beings that you should care for them?

Psalm 8:3-4

What is the most surprising thing you’ve learned about God? Here’s what I would say if you asked me: “That God is so much bigger and better than I thought he was.” The longer I have been a Christian, the more the bigness and the betterness of God keeps growing.

Truth be told, God was big when I first encountered him as a twenty-one-year-old. He was big enough to catch me as I stepped off a cliff and into his arms. At least that’s what it felt like when I surrendered my life to him. In that moment, God was not only big enough to catch me when I stepped over the edge but loving enough to flood me with a sense of his presence and peace. I felt safe, happy as never before. The years that followed brought many tangible signs of his goodness. He blessed my work in surprising ways, he freed my father from alcoholism, he led members of my family to him, he restored relationships, he blessed me with children.

To say that God has revealed himself as bigger and better than I first imagined is an understatement. But it is also true that I have attempted to shrink him down to size at times, to imagine, for instance, that he could not possibly forgive me if I couldn’t forgive myself, to pray as though he were my servant rather than I his, to doubt that he really cared about me at times when life seemed unbearably difficult.

I like what Chuck DeGroat, a pastor at City Church in San Francisco, has to say about the bigness of God: “Let’s face it: if you have a big God, you have to deal with big Mystery.”^a Perhaps that’s key when it comes to experiencing more of God. We have to deal with “big Mystery,” forgoing the temptation to shrink God. There is too much we do not understand. Too much we cannot comprehend. Faith is an adventure, a hard but joyful journey toward the God who is more powerful and loving than we have any right to expect.

Father, who am I that you should think of me? Yet you have called me by name and invited me to know you. May I know you in the deepest ways possible.

^a Chuck DeGroat, “On John Piper and Tornadoes Sent by God . . . ,” The New Exodus (blog), August 12, 2009, http://www.drchuckdegroat.com/2009/08/on-john-piper-and-tornadoes-sent-by-god.