Truly Putting Her First

Love . . . does not demand its own way.

1 Corinthians 13:4-5

GIVE-AND-TAKE IS fundamental to a healthy marriage. It is perfectly fine and healthy to be open about what you want. It is neither fine nor healthy to stubbornly insist on your own way. Today’s passage reminds us that love is not selfish. The application of this Scripture is wide and covers every aspect of your marriage.

Here’s a simple example: where to go out for dinner. We can voice a preference (“Hon, I feel like Italian food”) while also inviting her preference (“What sounds good to you?”). Couples with a healthy relationship routinely negotiate, take turns, and defer to each other in all sorts of ways. But what about the big stuff?

What is a Christ follower to do when the issue is far more momentous than where to eat or where to go on vacation? Tom is offered a big promotion with far more pay and opportunity if he accepts a position in a major city. He wants to seize the chance. His wife can’t imagine making the kids leave their school, their friends, their great youth group, and the sense of community in the small town they have lived in for the past decade. He sees all the advantages; she feels all the drawbacks. Tom’s inner jerk urges him to make a unilateral decision, to act selfishly rather than out of love. God’s way is for him to lovingly, painstakingly, prayerfully work through the decision together with his wife.

BOTTOM LINE

Jesus put others first, and He wants us to do the same. Are there areas in your life where you sense God is asking you to put your wife first?

Moment of Strength: Galatians 5:13-15