Worthy Of Friendship

Worthy of Friendship

Such love has no fear, because perfect love expels all fear.

“Thanks for putting up with me!” In loopy cursive, I finished writing the message in the high school yearbook and signed my name with a flourish.

I handed it back to the girl who sat next to me in concert choir, the same chairs we’d both sat in for the last four years. Though we weren’t close friends, after so many hours together, we were on amicable terms.

Glancing at my message, she looked me in the eye.

“Why do you always say that?” she said. Confused, I looked at her again. “‘Thanks for putting up with me’?” she said, the question clear in her voice, eyes grave. “I don’t sit next to you because I have to. I sit here because I want to.”

I had meant it in a joking way, but when she put it that way, it made me wonder—did I really think that my friends were just putting up with me, or did I think they liked me for myself?

I could chalk it up to teenage angst and insecurity, but sometimes I still think that way, even as an adult. The excuses are varied:

• “I don’t want to impose.”
• “They aren’t my friends; they’re Tim’s friends.”
• “We only hang out as a group, not one-on-one.”
• “We’re just friends with the same people.”

No matter the reason, the true heart of the issue is whether or not we truly believe we’re good enough.

While it’s true that some relationships form due to proximity, most friendships are created by choice. When insecurity sneaks in, we can combat it by recognizing that, as John says, there’s no place for the darkness of fear within the light of love. Fear has no place in our relationships, and recognizing that our insecurities are rooted in fear is the first step toward walking with confidence in the loving relationships Jesus has called us to.

— Kristin

— Today’s Act of Friendship —

Consider whether you truly believe that you’re worthy of the friendships you have. Spend time praying that God would show you how to see yourself as worthy and loved, the same way he sees you.