Remaining Openhearted

Remaining Openhearted

All have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, and all are justified freely by his grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus.

After a lull in the conversation, Sarah began telling me a story of her days in seminary two decades ago. She was living in California, and she and her cohort went on a mission trip to Central America. As they served alongside young people from several Central American countries, they became especially good friends with José, a young man who was on fire for God and who acted as their translator. They had an amazing time, adopted José into their crew, and promised to stay in touch with their new friends as they reluctantly returned home to continue their studies.

It was about six months later that they learned that José had come to the United States and was living in the same community. Life was busy, they were busy, and she quietly told me that not one of them had reached out to José. She fell silent, looking into her mug, then said, “The last I heard, José left his faith.”

We both wiped away tears that evening. Over José. Over that younger version of Sarah and her classmates. Over the other friends we’ve loved and lost.

I have yet to meet a woman who doesn’t have a friendship regret. We have all fallen short of the glory of God, and that means we may hurt others and be hurt in return, often unintentionally, through our sinful preoccupation and negligence rather than maliciousness.

What are we going to do with the hurt caused through friendship? When we’ve been hurt, we may be tempted to harden our hearts, closing them off so that no one else can come close enough to hurt us again. When we’ve been the cause of hurt, we may internally beat ourselves up for decades, convinced we cannot do friendship well and that there is no place for a second chance. But what if we took the hurts—both received and inflicted—and laid them openhearted at the throne of God, giving him the opportunity to redeem them and us and to strengthen our future friendships through it all?

— Julie

— Today’s Act of Friendship —

Examine the state of your heart. Spend the time necessary with God processing your regrets and asking for forgiveness even as you forgive those who have hurt you.