Distracting Interruptions

Distracting Interruptions

Tune your ears to wisdom, and concentrate on understanding.

An old friend and I hadn’t seen each other for several years. As she welcomed me into her cozy home on a crisp spring morning, I enveloped her in a hug and told her how glad I was to see her. She gave me a quick tour of her home, and then we settled into the living room, coffee in hand, to talk about how much life had changed since the last time we’d met.

The conversation was pleasant, but as our time together went on, I became more and more self-conscious. Every time I would open my mouth to speak, my friend would attempt to finish my sentence. It wasn’t just a word here or there; it was every single sentence!

I’m soft-spoken by nature, but I don’t really think of myself as being painfully slow to speak. Yet her constant interruptions made me hyperaware of my voice and what I was saying. Was I not talking quickly enough? Were my stories too boring? Was there something wrong with me? The persistent interruptions made me feel tongue-tied and clumsy, and I found my thoughts becoming more and more scattered.

As our time together drew to a close, I felt equal measures of guilt and relief. Although I was genuinely happy to see her, my self-confidence had taken a hit because of her newfound habit. Proverbs reminds us to focus on listening and understanding others because those habits foster wisdom. Since that coffee date, our friendship has faltered because I felt like my friend wasn’t really hearing me and didn’t care enough to listen.

Even though I try not to finish other people’s sentences, I’m still sometimes guilty of failing to listen well. How often have I waited impatiently for someone—a friend, my child, the person at the checkout—to finish speaking or relaying a long story so that I can hurry on with my day? Listening deliberately is a skill that needs to be nurtured with practice and patience. May we always choose to listen well to those around us and gain the wisdom we seek.

— Kristin

— Today’s Act of Friendship —

Remind yourself to listen well. When someone tells you a story, choose to ask additional questions of them rather than turning the attention back to yourself.