Brave Friendship

Brave Friendship

For everything there is a season, a time for every activity under heaven. . . . A time to be quiet and a time to speak.

We sat around the scuffed wooden table, the smell of pancakes and bacon redolent in the air. It was a chilly January morning, and our little group had chosen to meet up at a cozy restaurant for a weekend brunch. I had been the last to arrive, having made a slow haul along icy country roads, and I gave my friends breathless hugs before sitting down.

I expected the usual small talk, but I quickly realized that wasn’t going to be the case. The mood sobered as one of my friends began to speak. “I’ve been feeling really down since my last baby was born,” she said. “I would take him to a separate room to nurse so he wouldn’t get distracted by my other kids, and my thoughts would turn dark. I wondered if my life really mattered.” Six months before our meeting, she had decided she needed help and began seeing a counselor regularly.

“I wasn’t going to put that all out there, and then—” She shrugged. “I thought, why not?”

Like dominoes, the other women seated at the table began to tell similar tales: of stress and anxiety, bouts of depression, family trauma, the intervention of medication or counseling. Each woman at the table could relate in some way to my friend’s struggle, and her willingness to be brave gave each of us the courage to be brave too.

As we left that morning, I couldn’t help but admire how courageous my friend had been to speak freely about her struggles. It would have been easy to fill the morning with small talk, but instead, I left feeling deep gratitude for rich friendships that give space and grace for the hard things in life. Scripture reminds us repeatedly that our words reveal our hearts—but only if we’re willing to be honest with ourselves and with each other. There is a proper time to listen to our friends’ concerns and also a proper time to speak of what we are walking through ourselves. As friends, let’s support one another by providing the safe space needed to express our greatest joys and most vulnerable challenges in equal measure. It takes courage to admit the truth that life can be hard and good all at the same time.

— Kristin

— Today’s Act of Friendship —

Tell a trusted friend about a struggle you’re facing, and ask them to pray with and for you.