The Hurt Beneath The Pain

The Hurt Beneath The Pain

I said to myself, “I will watch what I do and not sin in what I say. I will hold my tongue when the ungodly are around me.” Psalm 39:1

As a country doctor, I’ve known many of my patients for years. When I see them, I often sit down and ask them how things are going. Sometimes they’ll complain about their latest ailment. Whether it’s a headache, insomnia, irritable bowel syndrome, or anxiety, they give me all the details.

I start by asking them the symptoms they’re experiencing, and then I ask them when the symptoms started. One thing I’ve noticed is that often the start of a physical ailment is triggered by a breakdown in a relationship with a loved one. The headaches start after a fight with a daughter-in-law. The insomnia happens the day a loved one takes away the car keys. The irritable bowel syndrome gets worse after harsh words with a neighbor.

As they tell me their symptoms and when they started, they move from describing their physical pain to unmasking their emotional pain. They’ll tell me about their fear, anger, or bitterness. They’ll even go so far as to give me the personal and intimate details of conversations that happened—or should have happened. As gently as possible, I try to point out the connection between their physical ailments and their emotional anguish.

Has someone ever said something that cut right through your soul? If so, realize that it can affect you and your health in many ways. When it happens, it’s important to pray through the issues.

Seek to resolve it like Jesus would.

This may mean having a confrontation with some honest words about how the other person hurt you. It may mean you need to ask for forgiveness for something you said or offer forgiveness for something the other person said. It may mean that you both need to agree to disagree so you can move past your past. These kinds of encounters can be hard, so I encourage you to seek wise counsel from a friend, a pastor, or a therapist to give you the courage to do what you need to do.

As much as I’d like to cure all of my patients’ physical symptoms, nothing I try will be a permanent fix unless they treat the underlying relationship problems as well.

TODAY’S RX

Don’t bury your pain; bring it to the Lord in prayer.

Lord, help me to release the pain and bitterness I feel from broken relationships. Ease my anger and lighten my heart, allowing me to forgive and move past what has weighed heavily on me for so long.