Day 242

Job 34:1–36:33; 2 Corinthians 4:1-12; Psalm 44:1-8; Proverbs 22:10-12

IN OUR READING from Proverbs today, we were told, “Throw out the mocker, and fighting goes, too. Quarrels and insults will disappear” (Proverbs 22:10).

We would all agree with this wisdom, but we normally think we’re not the mocker. We don’t always look in the mirror and realize the lengths we are willing to go to be right in an argument. Often, we lose sight of the fact that conflict is how we solve problems. We turn conflict into our strategy for doing battle with one another —we cease attacking the problem and start attacking people. This is what mocking does.

This word mocker has its roots in scorn and contempt.* In conflict, when we begin looking down on the one with whom we are disagreeing and consider their point of view beneath our consideration, we personalize this agitation. We use scorn and contempt as a weapon to win the battle —and we make it personal. In other words, we become the mocker.

When we lose sight of the problem and begin battling with a person, our pride manifests itself as arrogance, because we no longer seek to resolve a conflict. Rather, the conflict has become a battle to dominate. When this happens, the gloves come off and we find ourselves saying things that are viciously rooted in scorn, contempt, and mockery.

Wisdom’s counsel tells us that if we don’t bring the mocker into the mix, then fighting, quarrels, and insults disappear, allowing us to participate in productive conflict resolution.

Obviously, this is a difficult thing to manage in the heat of the moment. In conflict, one person usually says something a little over the line, and the whole thing blows up. How can we enter into necessary conflict without bringing the mocker? We simply must believe that our hearts are good toward one another throughout the process. When we believe that we are not engaging in conflict as a method of domination, our defenses fall. After all, there is nothing to defend if we aren’t being attacked. When we believe our hearts are good toward each other, we can remind ourselves that we are focusing on a problem and not attacking one another.

Watch for the mocker the next time conflict arises. Call it out and then (as the proverb counsels) throw it out. If we will do this, fighting, quarrels, and insults will disappear.

WORSHIP:

O God, we give glory to you all day long and constantly praise your name.