Wounding Words

Set a guard over my mouth, LORD; keep watch over the door of my lips.

—Psalm 141:3

We all need a small group of people who echo God’s love for us and his belief in us. In an ideal universe, these are the people closest to us, our immediate families. But this is not the case for so many people. The wounds so many people carry are not from the opinions of strangers but from the opinions of the people they love most.

If the people close to you are not for you, if they intentionally hurt you, if they consistently speak to you in a way that makes you feel less, or wounded, or unloved, even if they’re your family, you need to draw a boundary, and you need to protect yourself from their words.

If that’s the case, carefully choose another small circle who can reflect truth to you even when your family or people close to you surround you with hurtful words. We all need face-to-face reminders of God’s love and grace. Bring the wounding words to a safe circle, and invite them to help you replace those words with God’s truth.

Over time, the messages of pain are slowly replaced with messages of love—that’s some of the most sacred work we can do in one another’s lives.